Up With Downs

Down Syndrome Creed

2009-02-10T10:08:00.000-08:00

My face may be different but my feelings the same.
I laugh and I cry and take pride in my gains.
I was sent here among you to teach and to love
as God in the heavens looks down from above.
To Him I'm no different, His love knows no bounds
It's those here among you in cities and towns
that judge me by standards that man has imparted,
But this family I've chosen will help me get started.
For I'm one of the children so special and few
that came here to learn the same lesson as you.
That love is acceptance, it must come from the heart;
we all have the same purpose, though not the same start.
The Lord gave me life to live and embrace,
and I'll do it as you do but at my own pace.

-- Unknown

Bad Hair Days

2009-01-26T19:05:00.000-08:00

It has been such a wacky winter. First two weeks of snow, and now very cold and dry. Not a typical winter at all and the worst part is what is happening to Suzanne's hair. The cold and dry makes it impossible for her very fine hair to lay flat. It floats around her head in little strands that stick straight out. She looks like a porcupine.

Suzanne has a few tactile issues, meaning that she is picky about how things feel. She doesn't really like finger paints or sticky things, she only wears shoes when she has to because she checks out everything with her toes, and she hates to have anything on her head. No hair ties, barrettes, rubber bands or hats. She'll put the hood of her jacket up only if it's really windy and her neck is cold. This makes keeping her hair neat a real chore. We've tried short hair, but daddy thinks she looks like a boy. We are now growing it out, but now she gets syrup in it on a regular basis. Things really were easier when she was practically bald with that sweet little Mohawk...

Kirk, on the other hand, is going through an earnest phase of hat hair. Grandma Pat got him a Carhartt hat at the Big R (she was appalled that he wanted the brown one) and he wears it every day,which means his hair is a mess at school every day. Uhhhh....

Mom/Della! I want to apologize for all those years of insisting on wearing flowers with plaids and stripes and mismatched colors and forgetting to wash my face before I went to school and all those other things that drove you crazy. Your grandchildren are getting even for you.

I think I'm going to dress up a little today. Yes, I'm just vacuuming and doing laundry, but I clearly need to set a better example. Kirk is probably a lost cause, but there is still hope for Suzanne. In fact, here's a picture of me cleaning the kitchen...

White Christmas

2008-12-24T22:31:00.000-08:00

10:32 p.m., Christmas Eve

I wish I could say that not a creature was stirring, but alas the cats are on the prowl. They know something is up and are keeping tabs on everything. Perhaps they have some kind of feline Santa radar...

Kirk is sleeping in Suzanne's room tonight--he wants to make sure that they get up at the same time, run downstairs, and open their presents together. I fear for him sometimes--I think that his vision of how things should be will not match up with reality. Which is exactly what will happen if I don't get the last of the wrapping done.

11:10 p.m., guess I dozed off for a few minutes...

Greg is busy eating the Santa cookies, but he's taking a pass on the milk. Kirk insisted on helping me decorate the sugar cookies. I frosted them and he was going to do the sprinkles. He sprinkled 3 and decided that those were for Santa and, therefore, he was done. Now that Greg has polished off his favorite cookies, he is settling in with the cat. I suspect he'll be packing it in shortly.

I'm happy because I don't have anything to put together this year. All Kirk wanted were games for his Wii and Suzanne is getting a Hannah Montana with stuff, so I dodged the bullet. I suspect we'll be getting the HT dream house later, but for tonight it is just regular wrapping.

It's been a strange week. We have had a lot of snow, which is so unusual for our area. The song here goes, "I'm dreaming of a Wet Christmas!" White Christmases just don't happen in soggy Washougal, so the 3 feet of snow in the yard looks a little strange. It is very much like Christmas used to be when I was a kid. I've been driving neighbors to the grocery store for the last few days because I was proactive and did not let the snow pile up in the driveway. Most of the neighbors didn't shovel because around here it usually melts the next day. Not me! I shoveled and shoveled and now I am not trapped in my home with my kids. Those little trips to the store are what keeps a mother sane!

Suzanne doesn't really care for the snow. It is deep enough that it's over the tops of her boots and she got some down her neck, so she is not too impressed with the cold stuff. It was hitting her in the face and she kept saying "Ow! Ow! Ow!"

11:40 p.m., still no wrapping

Greg is still awake and has turned on "A Christmas Story." We've never seen it, so at least I'll have something to entertain me while I get finished with the wrapping. Santa should be here in about 20 minutes, so I should probably get to it.

11:45 p.m., still snowing...probably need to shovel again tomorrow...

Holly & Jolly

2008-12-05T13:29:00.000-08:00

Yippee! It is December, time to play Christmas Carols and...ugh...put up the tree. Don't get me wrong, I love the tree. But between Suzanne and Oscar, it is an event. Suzanne is curious and loves shiny things and Oscar is just an oaf. He thunders around the base of it and you're always holding your breath, hoping it will stay upright.

We had a few bad moments last Christmas because Suzanne took most of the ornaments off the bottom and broke a few. She didn't get any of the good ones, though, because those were all near the top. The red ones in particular took a hit. I'm interested to see if she does that again this year or if she has grown out of this particular annoyance. Guess I'll have to gird my loins and hope for the best...

Thanksgiving was nice, except for when it was a pain. I'm pleased that my folks recovered enough from our two-week stay in August to let us back in the house. I kind of thought they might change the locks before we got there! It was an eventful weekend. Suzanne had a massive cold, which she gave to everyone. She also got bit on the toe by my sister-in-law's puppy (not his fault--she stuck her toe in his face and he thought it was a snack). Friday night my mother the nurse got to lance her toe--poor grandma. Funny thing--after cleaning her toe with an alcohol swab and having a little juice and a good night's sleep, she was much better and her usual happy self. She still kicks me when I try to look at her toe, but she's fine and dandy now.

Dinner was marvelous, even with that brussels sprout thing that my sister made. I don't think I've had a brussels sprout since about 1968, but it was actually quite tasty! Suzanne had an entire plate of mashed potatoes and creamed corn--the good kind with the cream cheese. You do not want to stand between Suzanne and a plate of mashed potatoes....very dangerous...

Kirk got to go skating with his cousins at the Bill Collier Ice Arena at the Running Y Ranch. He had a great time and is really getting the hang of it. He never got too far from the wall last year, but as you can see, he is out in the middle now and one foot is off the ice. Yay Kirk!

Well, writing this blog is an act of procrastination, so I'd better get on with things.

The Robert Redford of Bears

2008-11-22T18:53:00.000-08:00

Do any of you remember my fascination and slavish devotion to Robert Redford? Or the 6 foot poster that was on my door at home and then on the ceiling above my bed in college? I'm sure mom remembers the poster because sometime in the late 70s in the dim glow of the early morning light, as she was having a half-awake tinkle, Robert scared her half to death all because she didn't close the bathroom door and thought a man was staring at her!

...but I digress. Take a look at this video. Personally, I think the bear is really sexy. Too bad the part where he's playing the air guitar isn't on this clip.

Rocky the Riverview Bear!

Every Day is a Winding Road

2008-11-22T17:26:00.000-08:00

I don't see how writers make any money. I can only write when I am inspired by something and lately that just hasn't happened. If I had the pressure of writing on a daily basis, I'd probably develop massive writer's block and starve to death.

Suzanne is in one of the phases where she's learning new things and doing new things and talking a lot. She has popped out with Thank you and You're Welcome, which is nice. If nothing else, I hope my children learn to be polite and pleasant to be around. She entertains her daddy by describing circle time to him--I don't think he knew what that was until recently. If you haven't been to preschool lately, that is where the kids sit in a circle around the teacher and listen to a story or sing songs. Suzanne knows "criss cross applesauce" where you cross your legs and put your hands in your lap. In fact, there is a little boy who has trouble with this instruction and she takes it upon herself to march over to him, cross his legs appropriately, and put his hands in his lap. Suzanne likes her favorite things to be orderly, and circle time is one of her favorite things!

Another cute Suzanne-ism is where she puts her hands on each side of your face, looks intently into your eyes and asks, "You okay?" The appropriate response is "I'm okay. You okay?" whereupon she will tell you yes or no, as the case may be. Suzanne appears to be grasping the concept of empathy--or perhaps she's just becoming nosy like her mommy!

We are making some headway on potty training. She will use the potty if you take her in there at the precise moment she has to go, but she doesn't initiate it. She likes her pull-ups and will tell you when they are wet, but she won't go to the potty before they get that way. She really likes to flush, but she only gets to do that if there is actual peeing in the potty. Oh well, we're getting there.

When you see Suzanne next to other kids with DS, it is rather amazing. She is getting taller and more slender rather than stocky. She isn't shy or reserved, she's very gregarious and outgoing. She is very independent. We were at a moms support group yesterday where they have a nanny to watch the kids, and the lady asked if Suzanne would come upstairs with her and she turned and waved "Bye Mama" to me without an ounce of hesitation. I suspect that she will be wanting to leave home as soon as she possibly can just so she can get on with some real fun...

Next week is Thanksgiving and we'll be staying at my parents' house in Klamath Falls. There is a new kitty to play with as well as a new cousin. Suzanne will get to meet baby Leanna for the first time, which will make her quite happy. She loves babies and likes to yell "BeeBee" whenever she sees one. Hope Leanna won't mind being yelled at with love...

Sorry this was such a boreathon--I'll try a little harder next time. In the meantime, watch the video that I am (hopefully) attaching. The big bear can really shake it and it shouldn't be too hard to guess who he is. BTW, it was about 90 degrees that day, so he gets big points for not getting heat stroke...

Product Update

2008-10-05T09:08:00.001-07:00

I have found another product that really works. As you know, Suzanne has been writing on things with various pens, pencils and the permanent ink Sharpies. We all try very hard to keep the pens under control, but let's face it. We are all human and occasionally one gets out--and Suzanne seems to have pen radar and can find them anywhere.

I tried a new product yesterday called Amodex Ink Remover. Supposedly it removes permanent ink from Sharpies. That sounds good, but would it also remove it from a microfiber sofa without changing the color? The answer is Yes! I have never had much success with ink other than getting it to fade a bit, but this stuff works like magic. It even took the lipstick off the carpet, which means that I can now put the wastebasket next to my desk instead of in a slightly odd place off to the side to cover the spot. Hooray, no more furniture in odd places!!

If you have a need for ink remover, give this a try. You can find it at Office Max next to the cash register.

Mystery Solved

2008-09-29T15:10:00.000-07:00

We have been in a bit of a tizzy around here. About a month ago Suzanne misplaced her "Hairspray" DVD, causing a huge amount of turmoil and hubbub in our household. Without her daily dose of "Good Morning Baltimore" she has been a bit crabby of late.

Well, I found it yesterday. I should have figured it out sooner--it was so obvious. I remember when Kirk was 2 and opened the door to the garage, got in the Explorer, and proceeded to shove nickles and dimes into the tape deck (remember when cars came with cassette decks back in the dark ages?). The tape deck has never worked since then and we are just lucky he didn't decide to take a whack at the CD player.

Suzanne did something very similar. I was trying to put a VHS tape into the slot, when it dawned on me that something was blocking the way. When I flipped up the cover, lo and behold I found a DVD. When I pulled it out, it turned out to be Hilary's "Shrek 3." Sorry Hil, I think it's a goner. However, upon looking further into the unit, I could see that there was another DVD lodged at the back. I ignored the label that warned against removing the cover and about 2 minutes later, extracted the missing "Hairspray" DVD. Of course, it is hopelessly scratched from being banged around by the DVD carriage, but at least I know what happened to it. Now if only I can find the upstairs remote...

On the school front, I've now had a couple of conversations with the WSD administration. They concede that they inadvertently reduced her class time by 20%, which gives me just the leverage I need to get Suzanne additional speech therapy. She is getting 30 minutes during class time and I'm going to ask for additional time individually so she can really get some concentrated attention. The kid really needs to be able to communicate better in order to have a successful kindergarten experience. I get the feeling that the school district won't be making this kind of boo boo again. It was just thoughtless and compounded by poor communication, but I am prepared to be magnanimous as long as Suzanne gets better services.

Kirk starts flag football today. Football is not my favorite sport, so I'm hoping that this is going to be enough to turn him off--much like the one season of soccer. I like basketball (a wonderful sport during a rainy winter) and baseball will be much more pleasant now that I've found the chairs with the built in cover. Knowing my luck I'll spend $65 on the darn thing and it won't rain at all next spring...

Better get back on 'mote patrol...

Buddy Walk 2008

2008-09-25T10:27:00.001-07:00

It is Buddy Walk time again--Yippee!!!

We really enjoy participating in the Down Syndrome Network Oregon Buddy Walk. It is a great group of people and they do a lot of good work in the community, including providing Welcome Baskets for new parents. These baskets are filled with goodies and resources that give new parents an uplifting and humorous look at what life is really like raising a child with Down Syndrome.

The Buddy Walk was established by the National Down Syndrome Society in 1995 to celebrate Down Syndrome Awareness Month in October.

The Buddy Walk has three primary goals:
1. To promote acceptance and inclusion of people with Down syndrome;
2. To raise funds locally and nationally for education, research and advocacy programs; and
3. To enhance the position of the Down syndrome community, enabling us to positively influence local and national policy and practice.

Additional Buddy Walk Facts

The Buddy Walk has grown from 17 walks in 1995 to more than 250 in 2005 across the country and around the world.

At least 250,000 people are expected to participate in more than 260 Buddy Walks this year.

Since 1995, more than 1,500,000 people have participated in the Buddy Walk program.

Last year alone, the Buddy Walk raised more than $5.5 million to benefit national education, research and advocacy initiatives, as well as local programs and services.

The Buddy Walk program is supported at the national level by the National Down Syndrome Society. Local Buddy Walks are organized by parent support groups, schools, and other interested organizations and individuals.

Most Buddy Walks take place from September through November, to recognize Down Syndrome Awareness Month in October.

John C. McGinley, who plays Dr. Perry Cox in the hit NBC show Scrubs, is the 2008 National Buddy Walk Spokesman. Mr. McGinley is both an accomplished actor and the proud father of Max, his 11 year-old son who has Down syndrome.

Anyone who wants to support acceptance and inclusion of people with Down Syndrome can participate in the Buddy Walk.

This year, fortunately, was not a repeat of last year's torrential downpour. It was actually warm and overcast, but not wet. Chris Burke, the young man who played Corky in "Life Goes On" sang with his musical group and there was a raffle (Kirk's favorite). There were several hundred people there and it's just a lot of fun.

Suzanne was so cute. She's old enough now that she didn't have to stay in her stroller and could mosey around with the rest of the kids. She really enjoyed the band and danced around with all the other little girls. Kirk had a great time running around and was having a great time right up to the point where he collided with a bigger boy and bonked his head on a tree trunk. He then proceeded to have a little melt down, which coincided with the end of the event. We piled into the car and took the long way home so that Suzanne would have a little nap. Quite a smashing day, eh?

Right this minute, however, she is running around with 5 or 6 pairs of Greg's underwear on her head. Don't panic, she pulled them out of the dryer, ergo they are clean. It's just that the visual is a little disconcerting. When you are pregnant and dreaming about the wonderful life that your daughter will have, running around with underwear on her head is not really a picture that comes to mind. I wonder if Miss America started out this way...

We are off to the Post Office--Aunt Susan is out of Mary Kay Anti-Aging Moisturizer (shameless product plug) and fears that her face will "crink up" without it. As her YOUNGER sister, this I would really like to see!

I'm BAAAAAACCCCCCCKKK

2008-09-24T11:32:00.000-07:00

Okay, two months have passed with nary a post from me. I would like to say that I've been busy (which I have been) but really I've just been lazy. We were on vacation the first two weeks of August, and I really didn't have much time to blog about anything because Suzanne needed intense watching.

That's not quite correct--my parents' house needed intense watching. Vacation for me wasn't so much a vacation as it was a geographic move of my regular life to a point 300 miles south to Klamath Falls. Probably the most interesting part of it all was watching Suzanne systematically crack every door and lock on the property. There is no room or area that Suzanne can't get into in that house, except my dad's bedroom because the door is slightly crooked and sticks. However, if Suzanne gets a little taller and shoves a bit harder, that door will be cracked as well.

I'm thinking that safe cracker or locksmith might be a career path for my little girl...

Oh, wait...I just realize that I've been experiencing selective memory. Suzanne did get into that room once. She was in there just long enough to flush Grandma's toothbrush down the toilet and clog up the works. This is why you should ALWAYS have a house with two bathrooms. On the upside, we discovered that the Roto-Rooter man lives just down the street and is willing to make a 6:55 housecall. Now that is good service!

Greg and I also attended our 30th high school reunion, which was a lot of fun. I was pleased to discover that in comparison, I look pretty fabulous for a 48 year old, as long as you don't count Judy Alexander who looks absolutely no different than she did on the day we graduated. It is Suzanne's influence--if you want to stay young, have children in your 40s. If the shock doesn't kill you, you actually get younger...

We are now back in school, hooray! I do have to write a stern letter to the school district chastising them for cutting Suzanne's program from 4 days to 3 days a week. I have a conspiracy theory, but it would only be sporting to let them try and explain why this happened and they didn't see fit to notify me earlier than 3 days before school started. As Kirk likes to say, I am dis-happy. I will not rant yet, but I will say that this is actually making me growl whenever I think about it. Grrrr....

All in all, the school thing is going well. Suzanne has established herself as a leader and her favorite job this year is as the teacher's helper. She really enjoys finger painting and I have many pictures that are all done in yellow, the color of the month. In fact, she made an art project the other day--yogurt ala rug! She snuck upstairs with 4 cartons of yogurt and put 2 on the floor in my room and the other 2 in her room. Then she proceeded to finger paint on her carpet. The funny thing is that I could tell it was actually an attempt at painting and not just a big mess. There was an actual design to it, very similar to one of her other paintings. Fortunately I discovered her before she could get started in my room and we spent the afternoon shampooing the carpet. If you want to see her fine work, come on over--you can still see the faint outline of raspberry yogurt if you look closely!

One of these days I'm going to be able to write the definitive book on cleaning carpets, walls, and other household surfaces! I have always thought I'd be famous for something, but master cleaner was not really what I've imagined...

One more hour of freedom...

Hot-n-Cold

2008-07-14T17:41:00.000-07:00

Well, it has been rainy and cold since November and now it has decided to go to the other extreme--HOT!

I am not complaining...

I am so grateful to finally have sunny days, that I don't really care if it gets Texas-hot around here. With the 90 plus days we are hearing the dulcet tone of borate bombers overhead and the banging of hip-hop music as teenagers drive by with their car windows down.

I am not complaining...

I am determined that the hanging petunia baskets (for which I purchased the expensive cascading petunias and lobelia) will not get incinerated by the afternoon sun. Many of the plants in the shadier backyard are growing to hugantic proportions this year, and I have yet to hit them with even one ounce of MiracleGro.

The people who complain about global warming need to come to my house and spend 9 months in gray, soggy drizzle to appreciate the finer aspects of sun and heat.

On the downside, it has been a little hot for even Kirk to venture outside. The backyard is nice in the evenings, but the front (where they like to hang out) is quite toasty. Suzanne on the other hand, isn't so picky about the temperature and likes to go out quite nakey most of the time. Even if she has clothes on when she goes out the door, they come off pretty quickly. But only in the back. In the front she seems to know that clothing is not optional. Social skills...so important as one ventures out into the world...

Last week was quiet because Kirk was in Klamath Falls going to basketball camp and staying with the grandmas. He had a wonderful time, as usual, but is still tired from it all. He is napping as I type this. The week was weird because Suzanne really had an awareness this year of his being gone. She was clearly discombobulated by it spent all day Saturday running to the window because I told her that Daddy was bringing Kirk home. When they finally arrived, she totally ignored Greg and started screeching "Kirkie! Kirkie!" at the top of her lungs. Boy was she a happy girl--for about 5 minutes which was how long it took Kirk to hook up his Wii baseball game with the bat remote extension. On his very first swing he whacked her in the head a) because he was excited and not being careful and b) because he was showing off to his buddy Cameron who had wandered over when he saw Greg's truck roll by. She was blubbering away, Kirk had the doomed look of a man headed for the gallows, and Cameron was curled up in a ball on the couch trying not to attract negative attention. Hysteria, chaos, we had it all...

We released Cameron from the asylum, checked Suzanne for damage and mopped her face with a diaper wipey, and informed Kirk that the Wii was off limits and he was grounded for the rest of the day. He had been home for about 10 minutes at this point. He finally got his nerve up to try the Wii again today and he has been VERY careful about making sure that Suzanne is in a safe place.

The blissful silence of naptime is over and Kirk is wanting to know what's for dinner. Not unusual, except that Kirk would really like me to tell him the entire menu for the week--not just today. He likes to plan his meals in advance...

Movie Review - Hairspray

2008-06-27T06:55:00.000-07:00

Recently we received this letter from a loyal reader --

Dear Jennie,
Why the fascination with the music from the movie Hairspray (2007)? This blog is supposed to be about Suzanne. Surely this movie is a bit sophisticated for her to appreciate? After all, the movie's major themes are civil rights, segregation, female impersonation, and big hair. You should expose your daughter to more age appropriate movie fare!
Signed, Beehive Betty from Boca

Betty, have you actually seen Hairspray? It is filled with bouncy and upbeat music, just the kind of stuff that Suzanne loves, and the dancing keeps her attention focused. I can just see my little Suzanne playing the role of Tracy Turnblad in the 2020 revival! And the concept of inclusion is not so different from the concept of civil rights. There is no way that Suzanne is ever going to take a backseat to anyone, unless the backseat is where all the fun kids are. And besides, you have to love a movie where John Travolta sings and dances in a bouffant wig and a fat suit!

Seriously, we are having lots of fun watching this movie, as it is in heavy rotation on HBO right now. Kirk loves it too, and has been secretly practicing his dance moves. Suzanne is a visual learner and actually learns more with repetition, which is why I don't mind all the reruns. And she just looks so cute dancing along with the characters--what's not to love!

Enjoy the musical selections that I have loaded on this blog. And to paraphrase Wilbur Turnblad from the movie, if Suzanne can't put a smile on your face, your skin is too tight!

A Whole Lotta Gorgeous

2008-06-20T10:51:00.000-07:00

Playgroup was a hit! We went to the Pride Center yesterday evening and both kids had a blast. They have such a wonderful facility with a great play structure designed for kids with mobility issues. Even though Suzanne no longer has mobility issues, she still loves to go there and play and make new friends. There were probably about 15 kids with DS in addition to an equal number of brothers and sisters.

I must say that there aren't very many things prettier than a room full of DS toddlers. The happiness that radiates could light up an entire town. Just imagine Suzanne magnified by 15.

Here is a picture of Suzanne that was taken when Pride's playground was first built in August of 2006...

As you can see, she needed a little help from brother to get down the slide then. Yesterday she was going down that very same slide head first!

Gotta go, Suzanne has just found my keys and has hit the car alarm so the garage is honking!!

June 21st--the first day of SUMMER!!!

Open Arms Playgroup
Third Thursday of the Month
5 pm to 7 pm
Pride Center for Kids
6511 NE 18th Street
Vancouver, WA

Happy Birthday Suzanne

2008-06-19T08:05:00.000-07:00

We had a lovely birthday party for Suzanne. She spent the day telling everyone that she is "Four!" It was fun to watch her because she usually hangs around the edges of the kids playing, but on Saturday she was right in the middle of things. We had a rousing game of Pin the Bow on Hello Kitty, which she wanted to play over and over. She's never had a party where she was the center of attention, so it was quite fun for her.

I really wanted her to have a girly party. To be quite honest, part of it is mother's guilt. I still feel guilty that we didn't beat the statistics when she was born. A 44 year old woman has a 1 in 25 chance of having a child with Down Syndrome and Suzanne was the 1. Her birthday is a time of mixed emotions for me--happiness at all the growth and progress that she's made and sadness that her life isn't just like everyone else's. I don't know if you ever get over feeling that even though you had no control over it, you let your child down in some way.

We are going to a DS playgroup for preschoolers today. Kirk loves to go almost more than Suzanne and just as she believes that all of his friends are her friends, he believes that all of her friends are his friends too. He does not discriminate and believes that segregation of any kind is evil. I'm so grateful that when my mothering skills aren't what they should be, Kirk is there to pick up the slack.

Summer

2008-06-13T12:51:00.000-07:00

Today was Suzanne's last day of school--summer vacation has officially begun! For some strange reason she just walked past me and whacked me with her Curious George. Sign of things to come?

Here is a partial list of all the things Suzanne has learned at or around preschool this year:

1. Shoes stay on--all the time. On the bus, at circle time, out on the playground, on the bus.
2. Lots of songs--Wheels on the Bus, Row Your Boat, Baby Bumblebee, Twinkle Twinkle and the ones that she makes up on her own.
3. Clean up--we make it easy with a big plastic tub to put stuff in. She also knows that baby wipes can fix those "personal" stains that a girl encounters now and again.
4. Waving--at the bus driver, her teachers, other kids at school. Everyone likes it when Suzanne waves!
5. Kleenex--she loves a clean face. Too bad Kirk never learned this lesson.
6. ABCs--she made it all the way to G yesterday, with a pause at LMNOP and ZEEEEEEE.
7. Colors--fortunately she colors a lot using green and yellow, which are daddy's faves.
8. Sympathy--if one of your classmates is crying it is a good idea to give them a hug and pat on the back.
9. Better table manners--no more sippy cups for Suzanne and she prefers the real forks and spoons.
10. How to group objects together, line them up, and count them. This works for toys, books, baby dolls, potato chips and shoes....which should stay on...maybe we still need work on No. 1.

We are having her first kid birthday party tomorrow and I'm looking forward to it. Our theme is Hello Kitty, which we love. I'll post some pictures after the event.

Big Juicy and the Froggy

2008-06-02T19:56:00.000-07:00

As I write this evening, Kirk and Greg are at a Portland Beavers baseball game in a "luxury" box. With my one good eye (and I do only have just the one) I am watching hunky Robert Redford in a forgettable 1970s era movie, but mainly I'm just watching Robert Redford. Suzanne is snoozing in the most uncomfortable chair in the house. She's not quite in the froggy position, but almost. If she goes full froggy, she'll probably roll out and then there will be hell to pay.

I haven't blogged in awhile because May was a horrendous month in terms of getting through the day without some badness from Suzanne. I've spent most of the month cleaning one thing or another and it still doesn't look like I've done a darned thing. It's like treading water--you may not actually sink, but you don't make any headway either. You're just out there hoping that a boat will come along before the sharks do.

She's so sweet when she sleeps. She snorts a little (tiny nose, easily clogged) and rolls around quite a bit. She's a good snuggler, but hot. Both the kids prefer to sleep next to Greg because he's an ice cube and appreciates the heat.

Oooh, Robert is trying kill a hit man with a fireplace poker--his longish 70s hair is falling over his eyes. Mmmmmmmm....

This child is such a puzzle. Some things she learns quickly, others not so much. The things I really want her to learn, she doesn't (potty training, complete sentences). Other things she picks up very quickly. It's a puzzle and I am hoping to solve it sooner rather than later. If only I could see inside her little head to figure out how things work in there. I don't want to change anything about her--but I could sure use a GPS.

I am thankful for a few things, though. I'm thankful that she has the ability to show love. I'm thankful that she is healthy and physically fit. I'm thankful that she is sociable and caring and that she has sympathy for those in distress. I love her beautiful smile and the way she squinches her eyes up when she's really happy about something. She is sunshine and she just radiates.

Except for this moment. She just woke up long enough to complain and remove her shoes and socks. It's jammie time, so I'd better get to it. I like this part--when she's really snuggly and just wants me to hold her and make everything nice. She's learned to give sloppy kisses--big juicies. I suppose that is an acquired taste, but I really like them...when her face is clean and free from snot, that is. She's not quite 4--I'm still working on cleanliness...

Everyone has a Talent

2008-05-08T15:31:00.000-07:00

It is fun to watch children as they grow up because everyday they evolve into the adults that they will someday be. Whenever I would get frustrated, my mom would tell me that everyone has a talent and I needed to be patient. Patience is not something that I have an abundance of, so this usually just added to my frustration, but I'm happy to say that over the years a couple of talents have finally emerged.

Suzanne has a talent already, and she is using it as much as she possibly can. Suzanne's talent is being Kirk's sidekick. She is Robin to his Batman, Tonto to his Lone Ranger, Jerry to his Tom. Suzanne is ready and willing to do whatever Kirk wants and to put her own particular spin on things.

We had a baseball game on Tuesday and Suzanne is a regular on the bench. The boys don't pay any particular attention to her most of the time, but Tuesday was different because Kirk decided to have her sing for them. If you live in Oregon or Washington, you have probably heard the ads for Sleep Country U.S.A.

"Sleep Country USAAAAAA. Why buy a mattress anywhere ELSE! Ding!"

Suzanne actually only sings the Ding part, but it really cracks up a crowd. Kirk's friend Noah has seen this little performance before, so he helped Kirk with the singing and then Suzanne chimes in with Ding! I hate to say it, but the boys on the bench were not paying attention to the game because they were busy watching Suzanne sing her part of the song. Even after Kirk went up to bat and got on base, they kept singing in order to get Suzanne to say "Ding!"

This isn't all Sidekick Suzanne can do. She's a really good fetcher as well. Kirk doesn't have to fetch the balls that he doesn't catch because Suzanne is usually hovering around ready to do the job. She also helps him clean up his room, although he never helps clean up her room. She even cleans his toothbrush! Of course she does this by swishing it in the toilet--we've been going through a lot of toothbrushes lately.

As Greg likes to say, behind every good man is a woman kicking him in the, uh, derriere. Well, behind Kirk is a sister intent on side-kicking him to the top. I just hope that is where he wants to go...

"Special Needs"

2008-05-04T13:13:00.000-07:00

Blech! Yet another word or phrase that makes me retch. "Special Needs" ranks right up there with "politically correct," "we pimpin'," "bling" and "awesome." These words and phrases simply grate on my nerves whenever I hear them, partly because they are overused, but also because they are meaningless. Take bling for example. Why say bling when, in most instances, it is more accurate to say hideous, gaudy jewelry worn in poor taste? Why say "we pimpin'" when it would be more accurate to say "I've painted and accessorized my truck to the point of technicolor tackiness."

Let us examine "special needs" as it relates to Suzanne. Her needs are not really so special. She only needs what every other kid needs. She needs love, nurturing, protection, friendship, patience, kindness, purpose, health, family, security, play, laughter, a brother to hold her hand, cinnamon toast, bandaids and a dry fanny. This is a pretty ordinary list when you really look at it. There is nothing too special about it, except for Grandma Della's special cinnamon toast spread, which has certain restorative powers when used during a crying jag.

The really special thing that Suzanne needs, which may not come to her automatically, is inclusion. She needs to be a part of the group, she needs to be where the action is, she needs to be accepted like every other kid on the block. The more that Suzanne is viewed by everyone as just another kid, the better she will do in life and the more she will be able to achieve. Inclusion is a vital key in helping kids with developmental delays to succeed.

It is interesting to note that in classrooms where there is a child with Down Syndrome, the test scores are higher than in other classes. Hmmmm...wonder why that is??

Anyway, don't look at people with delays as "special." Just remember, that they need exactly the same things that you do and the rest of it is just details.

Carpet Watch - Day 2

2008-04-28T17:40:00.000-07:00

Well....

My new favorite cleaning product is Bio-Ox! My Suzanne-decimated carpet is really clean and the stains are gone! Greg and I spent several hours vacuming and shampooing yesterday, and her carpet came out really nice. And it has a rather pleasing citrus aroma now. I know it won't last, but now at least I have a product to use as soon as I encounter another "gift."

Next...the windows and sliding glass doors that she loves to press her nose against!

Get your Bio-Ox here...

Carpet Watch 2008

2008-04-27T07:46:00.000-07:00

7:55 a.m. and Suzanne is still asleep. This is quite remarkable in that she is normally up between 6:30 and 7 and it is sunny today. I guess we really tired her out the last few days with our many and varied activities.

Let's start with Wednesday--on second thought, let's totally forget Wednesday and move immediately to Thursday. Kirk had his spring musical program Thursday evening and he was given a speaking part to perform. This isn't the first time Kirk has been in the spotlight. When he was 4 he played the peddler in the Pelican Gathering Preschool play, "Caps for Sale." He was also an extra in a soon-to-be-released movie called "Multiple." You can check him out on the Internet Movie Database website... Kirk Brown - Child in Park. He had a speaking part in the 2nd grade production of "The Frog Prince" back in February, and now he snagged a role as one of the narrators in the musical "Glow." It's about fireflies. Kirk has occasional moments of shyness, but overall he's pretty outgoing and likes to be in front of the crowd.

Suzanne sat there during the entire program trying to imitate the hand motions that were a part of the songs. She really got into the music and clapped enthusiastically after each song. Her teacher tells me that she loves circle time in school, especially when they sing. In fact, there is a little boy who refuses to sit with his legs crossed and his hands in his lap. Suzanne got so annoyed with his flopping around that she got up, walked across the circle to him, and firmly helped him cross his legs and put his hands in his lap. Then she marched back to her own spot and sat down. Woe to the kid who disrupts Suzanne's circle time!

Friday was baseball, of course, and for once it wasn't rainy. Kirk had a bit of a meltdown when he didn't get to play the position he wanted, but Suzanne was happy. She likes to sit on the end of the bench with the boys, and many of them have had a couple of years to get to know her, so they don't mind.

Yesterday we went to the Home & Garden Show at the Clark County Fairgrounds. We like to go to events there because it is

1. Easy access from I-5
2. Plenty of parking
3. The Clark County Dairy Women make wonderful milkshakes

We go to the fair every year and we occasionally go to concerts in the Amphitheater. Last year we saw ZZ Top and Chrissie Hynde. The ZZ boys are darned old and apparently quite deaf, but Chrissie Hynde (who is pushing 60) sounded great and was wearing these killer boots that I would love to have. Not being a rocker chick, however, I would probably look quite silly.

But back to the H&G Show. I have a system for choosing which booths to stop at. They have to talk to me first. If I make eye contact and they don't at least say hello, I don't stop. C'mon, if you are in sales and you can't at least squeak out a howdy, you should probably find another career.

I found a fun guy to talk to at the Bio-Ox booth. No, this is not compost created by oxen, it is a cleaning product that is supposed to take out odors and all manner of organic stains from virtually every surface in your house. As I told the guy, I don't care if it removes stains from my toilet, all I want to know is will it take out poop stains from the carpet in my daughter's room. That's it--if the poop comes out, I will buy some. He showed me how it works on red wine, soy sauce and tea, and how it cleaned the carpet pad as well as the carpet, and its ingredients are water, hydrogen peroxide and orange oil, and a bunch of other stuff that I don't remember. Now, perhaps I'm grasping at straws, but I bought a bunch of it in the hopes that my carpet could be saved. After we got home, I mixed a sprayer full and tried it out on some kitty barf, poopy spots, and a stain of indeterminate origin. I have to say that I'm rather amazed because everything came out. I had to scrub on a couple of stains, but overall I was pleased with my test. We are going to put some in the carpet shampooer today and really give it a test drive.

I'll keep you posted on the Bio-Ox situation. Gotta go now, though--it's pancake day at church and Kirk hates to be late...

Snow in April

2008-04-22T16:42:00.000-07:00

It hardly ever snows in Washougal, but it snowed off and on all last week! Fortunately it managed to stay about 40 degrees and sunny during Kirk's baseball game, but the rest of the time it was snowy and/or rainy.

I'm not complaining, of course, because my mom will not hesitate to remind me that she still has an unmelted snowbank in her backyard from the many feet of snow that dropped on Klamath Falls since December. It's just that it really isn't supposed to do that here, and so snow causes quite a stir.

Personally, I'm more annoyed by the unrelenting wind that makes traveling across the I-205 bridge a bit of a roller coaster ride. It is unnerving to have to steer into the wind to keep the car from sailing off the opposite side of the bridge. But that is just what Suzanne and I did on Friday as we took a field trip to Lake Oswego to go to a DS Mom's Coffee and meet with a speech therapist. As it turns out, I'm doing several things right, which comes as a pleasant surprise to me. She had a nice handout, which talked about how we learn speech and the different ways to learn new words. Suzanne is picking up words more easily now, so now is the time for Greg and I to really work hard at it.

In fact, Suzanne's beloved Dancing With The Stars is helping with words and counting! Last night they were giving the scores for one of the dance couples and Carrie Ann said "Eight," then Len said "Nine" and then before Bruno could speak, Suzanne shouted "Ten!" Suzanne was more generous in her score than Bruno, because I think he only gave them an eight.

Poor Greg--he used to really like having a little snuggle time with Kirk when he was little. They would get on their jammies and get in bed to watch a little TV and I would find them both asleep. Soooo cute. He likes to do that with Suzanne, but she always outlasts him. When I go upstairs now, Greg is usually snoring away and Suzanne is either sitting up watching TV or roaming around. One time, I found her on the floor at the foot of the bed snuggled up with a pillow and one of her dad's shirts. Still awake, though. What is exceptionally funny is when this happens with the 3 of them. Then I will find Greg and Kirk asleep and Suzanne in the middle, wide awake. I am the only one in this house who can outlast her.

Gotta go and teach Kirk how to clean his bathroom. He wants to do chores to earn Wii games, so we'll see how long his enthusiasm last...

Progress...sort of

2008-04-15T14:59:00.000-07:00

WARNING!

This post is going to be about poop. If you don't want to hear about it, then leave immediately. I realize that while this is a big deal to me, it is probably not a big deal to you, so here is fair warning...

I have the "Hunter Nose." It's kind of long and pointy (thanks, Dad) and consequently I have a good sense of smell. My nose leads me to many places and today it led me to my very own bedroom. I opened the door and there was my sweet, smiling Suzanne dressed in a pretty magenta top with nothing on the bottom. I asked her where her pants were and she said "all done." I was thrilled that she answered a question with actual words that I could understand. My joy at this was short-lived, however, once a bit of aroma begin to waft past my nostrils.

After a little bit of detective sniffing, I found both her pants and her pull-up (we've graduated to pull-ups) in the bathroom. Pants on the floor, poopy pull-up in the potty! She knows that poop goes in the potty, so she gets credit for that, but a partial demerit for including the pull-up in her total deposit. She has all the pieces, if only we could get them in the right order...

On a lighter note, it is baseball season again, which is really fun as long as it isn't raining. Our first game was on Friday and it was a balmy 65 degrees. Our next game probably won't be quite so nice as rain is in the forecast for Saturday. We'll just cross our fingers and hope for the best.

We had visit a couple of weeks ago from Max and Landon. It was great having Landon around and he and Suzanne really hit it off, but the best part was getting Kirk to play catch with Max. Kirk hasn't really wanted to work at baseball this year, and Max managed to light a fire under him. Kirk wants to really learn to pitch this year, just like his cousin Max and his Grandpa Frank, and he's really working hard now. Thanks, Max, you helped out more than you know!

Big sigh...I must go upstairs and put away all the clothes she took out of the drawers. She was using them to count with (good) but left them in the middle of the floor (bad).

A Good Life

2008-03-24T10:06:00.000-07:00

Happy Easter! We had a lovely weekend taking the kids to an Easter Egg Hunt in Hathaway Park on the only sunny day this weekend. Kirk really embraces the competition and enjoys getting out there picking up eggs. Suzanne, on the other hand, couldn't care less about those pushy kids and (in some cases) their equally pushy parents. She picked up 5 eggs and was done. Then she trotted off to the playground where she spent the next hour going down the many slides and swinging on the swings.

Suzanne has a good life. She goes to school on the bus which gives her a little independence, she knows how to play with boys, she works her dad like a pro, she's friends with all the checkers at Safeway and all the parents at little league, she brings sunshine to everyone she meets. Suzanne excels in the important areas.

Which brings me to the reason I haven't blogged for a month. I've really been a tad angry over something I read. Maybe I'm a big dope, but never, NOT ONCE, did I ever contemplate terminating my pregnancy. I'm not noble--it simply didn't occur to me. Yes, I had a clue that Suzanne might be born with DS, but I really thought that the notion that you had an amniocentesis and based on the results, made a decision to have an abortion, was really old fashioned. I really didn't think that people did that anymore, but it seems that I was mistaken.

As it turns out, approximately 90% of fetuses with Down Syndrome are terminated. Yup, you read that right--90%. I read an article by an editorial writer for Salon magazine that talked about the decision he and his now ex-wife made to terminate her pregnancy after they discovered that the child would have DS. The reason they gave was that the child would never have a good quality of life. What a moron...

Okay, perhaps I should be a little more understanding about what parents go through and the agonizing decision they have to make, yadda yadda yadda. Sorry, no can do. The notion that DS kids and adults do not have any "quality of life" is so utterly ridiculous. Who defines "quality" anyway? Your life is what you make of it, and so is Suzanne's. One thing about Suzanne is her ability to get the maximum amount of fun out of everything she does. My job as a parent is to provide her with experiential opportunities and it is up to her to make the most of them.

According to this guy and many others, if you're not going to have a quality of life (as defined by him, I guess) then you should be whacked. That would be called eugenics, a practice that was popular in Nazi Germany. Okay, I'm not calling this guy a Nazi, but eugenics was a bad idea then and it is a bad idea now.

90%. Done ranting now...

Each year in communities around the country various DS organizations sponsor Buddy Walks. These are community walks to raise awareness and acceptance of people with Down Syndrome. If you would like to find out if there is a Buddy Walk in your area, please let me know.

Friends Don't Count Chromosomes...

'Mere Ok!

2008-02-28T15:03:00.001-08:00

If there was an award for "Best Kitty Ever" it would certainly go to Oscar Brown. And he would have earned it!

Take this photo, for example. As you can see, Suzanne has him in her toddler death grip. Oscar knows that if he just sits and relaxes, he'll be able slide out momentarily and be on his way. Now, I don't think Oscar is the brightest bulb in the box (he keeps coming back for more...and more.... and more), but he is so gentle with her. Suzanne is learning to be gentle with him and is also learning a new word, "Dentoll, Ok, dentoll..."

Last week she fell asleep in one of the recliners and he snuggled up next to her and snoozed as well. Oscar has clearly decided the she is his person and he is her kitty. It isn't unusual for me to find him on her bed or in her room. He likes me, too, but he really likes Suzanne best. Emmy, on the other hand, has assigned herself to Greg and will only pay attention to the rest of us if he's not at home. She clearly has forgotten that he was the meany who took pictures of her after she, with cat-like grace, fell in a full bathtub.

We've had some rather nice weather lately and Suzanne decided today to explore the back yard. Oscar was right there with her, playing with her and generally keeping an eye on her. She ran his legs off and now they're both having a nap. Hope that flower she ate isn't poisonous...

Suzanne Speak

2008-02-17T08:37:00.000-08:00

Suzanne is a multi-lingual child, I think. For the longest time she sounded like she was speaking Russian, but we decided perhaps not when she was sitting next to some Russian folks and they didn't seem to know what she was saying. Then we started to think it was French, with all the jzshhing she's been uttering. Unfortunately, we don't know any French people.

Lately, however, I have noticed an increase in actual words that I think are english. Or at least "Suzanne English." Here is a list with translations....

Milk = Mill
Kirkie = Gookie
Oscar = Ok
Come Here = Mere (as in 'mere Ok)
Cookie = Cookie (no question about this one!)
Juice = Jzshoos
Shoes = Shooooooz
Socks = Toks
Jacket = Shacket
Train = Tain (Usually Tain! Tain! Tain!)
Bus = Sus
Boom = Boom
Bear = Beer
Karissa = Rissa
Hilary = Hilly
Grandpa = Bampa
Grandma = Bamma
Please = Weese
Thank You = Tank ooo
Excuse Me = Skoo me

This is by no means an exhaustive list--she pops out with new words every day. She'll see something and say the word and if you aren't listening closely, you'll miss it. You particularly have to watch for her patting her fanny and saying "boop." Any doubts as to what that means?

It's like a flood gate has opened and she can't get them out fast enough. She still sounds french, but at least the words are english. I guess she was destined to speak french, since her name is french and means lily. Pretty name for a pretty girl and pretty soon we might even understand her!

Happy Valentine's Day - TURN UP YOUR SPEAKERS!

2008-02-14T09:31:00.000-08:00

We are having a fun Valentine's Day this year. I got to make valentine's for Suzanne's preschool class, which is a nice little milestone for her. She really liked the stickers, but she wasn't much help in putting them on the valentines. She preferred to stick them on her clothes instead.

Kirk waited until the last minute to do his valentines, but he finished and took them to school this morning. He a moment of greed when he decided to keep all the pirate tattoos and not put them inside, which is what he was supposed to do. Guess we need another lesson in sharing. On the other hand, he asked for advice on how to ask a girl to be his valentine. He wants a girl to be his valentine, but he doesn't want to be rejected. I explained that most 7 & 8 year old boys are goofballs and won't ask, so he pretty much could get any girl in class to be his valentine and probably all of them. I tried to impress upon him that it is the boy who asks who gets the valentine, and the boy who doesn't gets zip. He ran my advice past his father to make sure I was telling him the truth. I did notice that this morning he took extra time with his ablutions, wore a nice shirt and his good jeans, and smashed his bed head down in the back. Reminds me of my nephew, Max...

Kirk also wanted to make sure that we had some valentine cookies...for Suzanne, of course. I suspect Suzanne will be encouraged to share her cookies with Kirk, and because she loves him, she will.

Speaking of love, here is one of my favorite pictures. When I tell people that Kirk has always loved and protected Suzanne they don't always believe me, but I know it's true. Even if he doesn't get brave enough to ask a girl, he'll still have his very first Valentine, Suzanne.

Gotta dash...I'm delivering Valentines to Hilary, making cookies, and getting Kirk a heart-shaped pizza for tonight.

Oh yes, enjoy the music...these are two of Suzanne's dancing favorites!

Queen of the Foamers!

2008-01-31T15:14:00.000-08:00

Some of you may be wondering what a Foamer is and why they need a queen. Well, I learned all about foamers when I first met Greg. On August 7, 1988, after our 10-year KU reunion picnic, he invited me to his apartment to look at his slides. Being the very worldly urbanite that I was, I figured this was just a new take on "come see my etchings." Turns out he really did just want to show me slides, which was really geeky since the only other person I knew with slides was my Grandma Mary. We looked at slides of train locomotives...lots and lots of them. Sometime during this ordeal he told me that guys who are train enthusiasts call themselves "foamers"--that is to say, they foam at the mouth whenever they see a train. Even as I write this, I still can't believe that I found this to be cute and endearing and that a year later we were married. Astonishing!

Anyway, back to the queen part. When Greg moved to Portland when we got married, he met some other foamers and started going out on Friday nights with them. When they changed bars (to one where the ladies room actually had a roof) I decided to join them. I soon discovered that while they were basically nice guys, they are all a little odd in one way or another and ergo there is a reason they were all single. Nonetheless, in either 1991 or 1992, I decided to throw a party on Superbowl Sunday. In spite of the hideous olive balls, it was a lot of fun and I've been throwing one ever since. Somewhere along the line I also started making birthday cakes for most of the guys and eventually I crowned myself Queen of the Foamers. They are really like a bunch of puppies--if you leave out food for them they'll follow you anywhere!

Over the years I've refined the menu (no more olive balls) and so I basically do the same thing every year--except last year and there was hell to pay. I'm going to slide in a smoked salmon ball and some asparagus spear rollups, but aside from that I'm sticking to the traditional baked roast beef and turkey sandwiches that have made me famous. Yes, the recipe comes from my sister, but they don't know her so I take all the credit for it. Hmmm....maybe the shrimp ceviche would work...

I'm hoping that Suzanne is in good form. The last time we saw the guys at the train depot was the weekend of the gurgling squirters--rotovirus. These are guys who aren't married and don't have children, so they are pretty scared of Suzanne. Not because she has Down Syndrome, but because she is a 3 year old girl. I don't really blame them--she smelled so bad and pooped all over the inside of the Explorer, which wasn't really the impression I wanted to leave with anyone. Maybe this weekend we'll get really cute and adorable Suzanne. Although if she lets out one of her man-burps, they'll probably get a kick out of it.

Kirk is thrilled. He is going to be in a play on Friday, his basketball game and a hockey game on Saturday, and the Superbowl on Sunday. He informed me this morning that this was going to be his best weekend ever. Kirk is a boy who knows how to enjoy his life.

Oh well, the Queen had better get off her throne and start a shopping list!

2008-01-20T11:07:00.000-08:00

What a whirlwind. Like the east winds that come blasting down the Columbia River Gorge, the last month has absolutely flown by. January is supposed to be a boring month, but for me...not so much.

Christmas was fun. We had a great party on 12/22 and I was thrilled with the turnout. I made a signature party drink called a Cranberry Smash and I couldn't mix them fast enough. We had very few leftovers (Susan, as usual, planned my menu for me...) and no one wanted to leave. I think it was a success and I was quite thrilled by it all.

Suzanne really got into the opening of presents this year. She didn't quite know what to do with the boxes once she got them open, but she enjoyed the chaos of it all. Kirk was more than helpful with the unwrapping and opening of her boxes. He doesn't really care who the boxes are for--he just likes to unwrap things. He got a Wii and fortunately for me, it was easy to set up. It is quite a clever game with an interactive remote. And it is harder than it looks. I pulled a muscle in my fanny playing the bowling game and I still barely made it over 100!

Mom and Dad came up for New Year's this time and we took them to the New Year's Eve hockey game. I think mom enjoyed it even though we lost. This is a "transitional" year for the WinterHawks, which is to say that our team really stinks. Oh well, it was fun anyway. One of the highlights was my hike with Hilary out to the parking garage to change her flat tire. Yes, Hilary had a tire that was low and instead of taking care of it beforehand (head-in-the-sand-Hilary) she drove downtown anyway. I was a bit perturbed when I discovered that Hilary did not have a lug wrench, but fortunately the nice young men who were smoking in the garage were happy to help. Turns out they were waiting for their wives and kids to get to the car--nothing sinister about that.

After we took care of Hilary's problem, she went off to a party where she got into some kind of tiff with her not-boyfriend, Jesse. Long story there...

Since we wore out mom and dad, home we went where everyone collapsed into bed well before midnight and Greg and I went to a party at the neighbors. This seems to be a recurring theme when mom and dad come up--run their legs off until they drop and then send them home to recuperate.

An interesting thing happened at the airport--when Suzanne figured out that Grandma and Grandpa were not getting back into the car she started to cry. In fact, she blubbered all the way back to the freeway and then started hiccuping. Glad mom didn't see that--it would have done her in!

Since then, things have been rather chaotic. The weather has been dismal, which means that we've had a couple of snow days--kids at home being bored, so fun! Then we had a rather nasty run-in with the rotovirus, which took Suzanne and me out for an entire week. Blech! Suzanne is a trouper, though. She would blast a cloud of the most foul-smelling gas imaginable and giggle at the sound she made. As horrible as it was, she had a much better attitude than me.

2008 is not starting very auspiciously, but we have no where else to go but up!

Warm your heart with this.

2007-12-14T08:20:00.000-08:00

Eureka! I just had one of those moments. You know, the one where you think (briefly) that you are not making a botch of parenting and might actually be doing something right.

Today is the last day of school before Christmas. Kirk was very eager to get to the bus stop, because if you leave early, you get out of school early, right? This 7 year-old boy logic. Anyway, he was putting on his coat and his backpack (which he left in a heap by the front door) and Suzanne was standing there watching the whole thing. I went into the kitchen for my second cup of coffee and heard this little exchange...

Kirk to Suzanne: "Goodbye, I love you, give me kisses!"

Mom to Kirk: "Goodbye, honey, I love you!"

Kirk to Mom: "Mom, I wasn't talking to you!"

Clearly all his love is reserved, at least this morning, for Suzanne. And I think that is fine and dandy. He didn't even seem to mind that she was standing there wearing nothing but his UofO Jersey. And for once she didn't get annoyed that he gets to leave for school before her. She's going to be really irked next week when we don't get on the bus at all...

We are also going to hockey tonight, which is always a good time. We are going to take one of Kirk's friends and Kirk has decided to use some of his own money to buy snacks. He has a bank that was given to him by his Grandma Della that is filled with dollar bills, also given to him by his Grandma Della (she sticks a dollar in every card she sends). Since I'm not very forthcoming with bucks for snow cones and cotton candy, he's going to spend a few of his own and treat his friend.

Suzanne loves hockey and is really getting into the cheers. The best one is the one that they do whenever they make a goal. Haven't had much practice with that, unfortunately, because the Winter Hawks really stink this year, but we are always hopeful that the next game will be the one where they pull it together and make some goals. Suzanne will be happy as long as she gets to hug the mascot, Tom-A-Hawk. Cute name, eh?

Nag and thou shalt receive

2007-12-11T12:03:00.000-08:00

I'm very impressed with Kirk. That boy has great focus and determination, traits that will serve him well later in life. It's kind of a big pain for me, but good for him.

Grandma Pat can take credit for this one. She decided to take all of her grandkids skating over the Thanksgiving weekend. FYI--Klamath Falls has a really nice outdoor skating rink and a nifty Zamboni to keep the ice smooth. Not like the old days where you'd practically break a leg skating on the lumpy, bumpy rink out by Moore Park or, heaven forbid, the "A" Canal. It was Kirk's first time skating and after he decided to let go of the wall, he did pretty good.

This led to two weeks of nagging to go to the Lloyd Center skating rink. We decided to go this past Sunday because it was a benefit for the food bank and we could finish our shopping. Kirk spent about 4 hours skating while we went to various stores in the mall to shop. He wouldn't even leave to eat lunch, so we got him a dog, chips and a root beer.

This happy event led to a few hours of nagging about our tree. Can we put it up? Can we put it up TONIGHT?????

At approximately 9:30 pm Sunday I finished putting up the tree (thank goodness for fakes). Kirk is finally getting the hang of spreading out the ornaments and not putting all the reds together. The same cannot be said of his father, but Kirk did a good job of coaching his dad to space them out a little better. Kirk takes the tree decorating quite seriously.

Suzanne, for once, paid very little attention to any of it. She got her hand swatted once and seemed to having enough of decorating She likes to sit on the couch and look at the lights, but she's doing a good job of keeping her fingers to herself this year. The next test will be when I put some presents under the tree. I wouldn't bother except that Oscar has taken up residence underneath the tree and he's as clumsy as an ox and could bring the entire thing down.

We are having a cozy holiday this year. I'm throwing a party on the 22nd for our friends and neighbors, which will be a lot of fun. The highlights will be Grandpa Wick's egg nog (a boozy holiday treat!) and Susan's hot crab dip. I'm also going to offer a signature holiday drink. I'm torn between the Ginger Martini or a Cranberry Vodka Slushy. If you have a preference, please let me know.

Suzanne loves a party and I'm sure she'll be the queen of this one. It is nice having two kids who are social and good in crowds. I just hope she manages to keep her clothes on the entire time. When she feels like getting nakey, she doesn't care who is in the house.

Yikes! Banging from upstairs...wait...it's from the bathroom. Please let me find Suzanne sitting on the potty!

Never a dull moment...

2007-12-04T10:16:00.000-08:00

I remember the first time Suzanne met Santa. It was our first Christmas in Washougal and we took the kids to Meier & Frank (now Macys) to see Santa on the 10th Floor. It was the last year that Santaland was open. Just think "Miracle on 34th Street"--that's what it was like. Suzanne waited patiently in line for nearly 2 hours, smiling and laughing the whole time. The second she got seated on Santa's lap, she busted out crying and wouldn't stop. Kirk's smile was big enough for the both of them, and he refused to let her bad mood spoil his good time. I think we used that picture in our Christmas letter that year--Suzanne yelling and Kirk giddy with joy.

Then there was last year. My sister and I decided to celebrate a little with a Girl's Night at the Melting Pot Restaurant (all fondue, all the time--yum!). Greg is not one to sit at home with the kids, so he got Hilary and took the kids for a ride on the Holiday Express steam train. Suzanne didn't exactly cry when she encountered Santa, but she did look at him with suspicion in her eye.

And then there was last Sunday. The Down Syndrome Network Oregon hosted a Christmas party at the Portland Children's Museum and I would have to say that Suzanne has overcome her distaste for fat bearded men in red suits. She sat on Santa's lap, she danced with elves, she played in all of the exhibits, and she did it while battling a fierce case of plumber's butt. Poor kid could not keep her drawers up no matter how tight I cinched the waistband!

Oh well, Suzanne does not let these little inconveniences distract her from having a good time. Or from meeting new friends. She was quite taken with a little guy named Sam who is 2 1/2. They sat together during the magic show. She stole his snowman, he responded by taking her reindeer. Finally, a man who doesn't let her push him around. Kirk, pay attention!!

It was so nice to have a nice family day considering what happened last Tuesday. Oh gee, did I not mention that we had to repaint the house last week? OK, slight exaggeration. We had to repaint the upstairs from the 3 foot line on down because Suzanne found a magic marker and decided to practice writing her "T's" from Kirk's room clear down to the front door. At approximately 3:30 p.m. last Tuesday I found her sitting in the living room painting between her toes with a blue magic marker. I wasn't too bothered by this because magic marker comes off after about 3 baths. At approximately 3:31, I turned toward the stairs and my eye was drawn upward by the blue marks going up my staircase wall...upward across the computer room door...thence to the master bedroom...thence to Suzanne's door...thence down the wall to Kirk's room. She painted the carpet also. My eye is beginning to twitch just thinking about it.

I hurried to get the marks off the woodwork just in case it decided to soak in and need to be sanded. This took about an hour. Then I started working on the carpet, got ready for a meeting, reminded Kirk to get ready for basketball, released Suzanne from the prison of her room, then discovered that she had done this little number on the living room couch! More squawking ensued as I tried to rescue this piece of furniture and some blue marks on the hardwood floors. We then piled into the car and went to basketball practice, where I was glared at by Greg because I was late. I explained to him that when he saw the walls, perhaps he'd understand. When I got home later that evening, I discovered that he had spent the time repainting. We still have a bit of touchup to do, but most of the blue is gone now.

Kirk is nagging me to put up the tree, which I want to do, but I'm hesitating because....well, you can probably see why I'm hesitating. Sigh! I need to time it so that the tree is up long enough to please Kirk but not so long that Suzanne's tree shenanigans tempt me to flee the country.

Balance, life is all about balance....

No Tricks, All Treats

2007-11-05T15:58:00.001-08:00

We live in such a great neighborhood. Halloween was so fun this year with all the little trick or treaters coming to the door and the kids had a blast. Hilary came over to hand out candy, which puzzled me until I remembered that my sister lives in a house on a very steep street, up which no little ghost would dare to climb. She's never really had the fun of opening the door to see all the little princesses and superheros. I don't know how many kids we had (mom always counts, but I get distracted) but it was probably around 80-100.

Suzanne went to a couple of houses, but she really had more fun with Hilary. They opened the door and gave out candy and Suzanne waved and giggled all evening long. Whenever the doorbell rang, she'd run down the hall yelling "Door! Door!" We didn't have dinner until around 8p.m. because neither one of the kids could sit still long enough. The weather was mild and a good time was had by all.

The next day Suzanne had her parent teacher conference. She is at the head of her class in the areas of knowing the class routine, moving to different tasks, and following instructions. She is learning her colors, she can count to five, and she is now able to say two word sentences. It turns out that her teacher started her career in special ed, which is why she is so in tune to what Suzanne needs. In fact, this is the first year that Washougal has practiced inclusion at the preschool level, and Mrs. Stump is the reason for that. You can find good teachers everywhere--even in little old Washougal!

Speaking of teachers, I'd like to talk about school funding. Most school districts are underfunded. Teachers do not get paid what they are worth. Washougal was finally able to put P.E. back in the grade school curriculum this year, but just barely. Kirk has been in a class size of 25 or more each year, which makes it hard for the teacher to give good individualized instruction. Parents are called upon more and more to fill in as teacher's assistants in reading and math. Quite frankly, if there is any measure on the ballot that increases funding to schools, you should vote for it. The way that we expect schools to get by on a shoestring is deplorable. Let me ask you this--do your want your future doctor, the person who saves your life, to be the smartest kid or the one who who didn't get to take chemistry? Do you want your house to be built by the kid who flunked out or the kid who can do geometry so that your walls are straight and your roof doesn't cave in? Take your pick. The money that you put into your schools today will be paid back to you as these kids grow up well educated and with a desire to do great things in life.

Okay, I'm done now. Back to our regular programming...

WARNING: Get some kleenex...

2007-10-24T15:52:00.000-07:00

A Friend Like Me

by Traci Sandrock

Please don't be afraid of me

I want to be your friend,

And if you get to know me

Your rigid thoughts might bend.

Thoughts that I am different

From others that you know,

I really am no different

And this I'd like to show.

I live and breathe and laugh and cry

I love to play and learn,

I sometimes do things differently

Which can cause some concern.

You see some say I'm special
I guess this much is true,

But if you were to ask me

I'd say you're special too.

We're all a little different

No two are just the same,

It's really something wonderful

The way there is no blame.

When things don't go just perfectly

and others get confused,

And say things like "poor child"

and others terms they use.

It's okay if you look at me

And might not understand,

It's okay if you touch me

And even hold my hand.

My life has many obstacles

Much more than you could know.

But that's not what I dwell on

I'm me, that's all, and so...

Please don't be afraid of me

I want you just to see,

How truly great and wonderful

A friend like me can be.

Soggy Sunday

2007-10-22T10:12:00.000-07:00

I can't quite decide which way to go this morning. It must be the sun. You see, we haven't had much sun lately and it's throwing me off. In fact, we are 1.5 inches over our normal rainfall for the year. Now, for those of you who live in more arid climates, an extra inch and a half is probably a good thing. I, however, live in the PACIFIC NORTHWEST! We get plenty of rain, thank you very much, and an extra 1.5 means you should start looking for a large wooden boat.

I'm a bit concerned because a new family moved to the neighborhood, and the kid's name is Noah. This cannot be good...

The rain managed to hold off yesterday, however. We went to a pumpkin patch party put on by a local Down Syndrome support group. There were some bigger kids, mostly boys, so Kirk got to play a little football and toss pumpkins down a hill at a target. Suzanne made friends with the folks who hosted the event and then invited herself into the house, and around the back, and eventually into the water fountain. She liked the pumpkins and got to draw for one (as you can see, she got a nice one). Then she started running after the pumpkins as they rolled down the hill. This went well until one actually hit her, but she got up and started yelling at it. Everyone who saw this started laughing because it was clear that she was ticked off and letting that pumpkin know what she thought!

The folks who hosted this event don't have a child with DS--they are friends with 2 other families with DS kids. Their own kids are teenagers, so when they got too old for the pumpkin patch party they decided to continue holding it for DS kids. There are special people everywhere, and the Welchs are one of those families.

Suzanne crashed in the car on the way home. She just about ran her little legs off, had more than her share of cookies, and combined with the fresh air, she didn't have a chance. We were down in Lake Oswego, so after we did a little sightseeing (lots of fabulous houses to look at) it took us an hour to get home. The little snores from the back seat are so adorable...

I'd love to write more, but I have a garden full of dead stuff to pull up and throw in the yard debris bin. The day is sunny and Suzanne is at school, so I'd better get to it.

For A Quiet Evening, It's Awfully Noisy

2007-10-18T20:25:00.000-07:00

We're having a yawnfest around here. It's Thursday night and the kids (and Dad) are tired from a long week. Suzanne is sitting on Greg's lap, blankie on her lap, and she's sucking her thumb. That tells you how tired she is--she NEVER sucks her thumb. Greg is yawning sympathetically. Every once in awhile she looks up at him and gives him a kiss.

Kirk is a bit wound up because he's been grounded today. He tried to dispose of last night's vegetables in the bathroom trash, and since I used to do that stuff myself, I figured it out. He tossed a couple of perfectly nice carrots in the trash. At least I chose a truly horrible vegetable to dispose of--Brussels Sprouts!

We are engaging in one of Greg's favorite pastimes, watching Fox Sports Classic. Who knew that there was a cable channel that showed old college football games. I don't really see the point, since I already know who wins this one (Oregon 31, Huskies 20), but we're watching anyway. In case anyone out there cares, this is the game with the famous Kenny Wheaton interception and touchdown of 1994. The best part is checking out the uniforms to see how much they've changed. Since the interference of Nike, the uniforms have lost their Disneyesque quality. Bring back the gold pants, I say!

My kids are getting such an eclectic education from Greg and I. If my kids aren't math geniuses I'll be surprised because they spend a lot of time learning sports trivia and stats. Greg is very patient as he explains this play or that and what it means in terms of overall strategy. From me they are getting sound fashion advice. "No, football players should not bare their midriffs, no matter how nice a 6-pack they have. It's just tacky!"

In between the yawns, Suzanne is trying out her new skill--counting to 5. You can tell she's tired because she keeps editing it a bit. It's coming out, "One.........Fo Fi!" Usually two is her favorite, but she keeps skipping over it. The funny part is when she watches a tackle on the TV, she yells "Down!" My kids know their sports, for sure.

Kirk, on the other hand, is skipping over nothing. In fact, he won't shut up tonight. Gad! Now he's whistling! Nope, now he's doing that tongue clicking thing that kids do. If he starts cracking his knuckles I'm done for. Well, both cats are purring now, isn't that just swell! Note to self--buy ear plugs...

Nature...ick!

2007-10-11T08:02:00.000-07:00

This will come as a shock to some of you, but I'm a GRANDMOTHER! If you are wondering how this is possible, please refer to my post on August 31. My sandbox is the home of one actual frog and a bazillion tadpoles. Yes indeedy, one of Kirk's original tadpoles turned into a frog (that half-tadpole, half-frog stage is a little creepy) and through the magic of reproduction, I've got more baby tadpoles than ever. I think we are going to have to engage the services of the Tadpole Relocation Program. Actually that will just be me with a bucket of tadpoles hiking down to the creek. You try to be a good mom and provide your children with a close-up glimpse of nature but really you just end up running a branch of Planned Parenthood for Amphibians! No good deed goes unpunished!

I was also called upon to make a fairy house this week. It turned out quite nice with some interesting rocks that Kirk found, some maple tree leaves and the petals of my smashed chrysanthemum that the neighbor kids jumped on. You can't use living material, but I figured since the flowers had been killed by someone other than Kirk, we could get away with it. Kirk got to display his fairy house in the school library, so he was happy.

Today is a school in-service day and so all the neighbor kids are massing outside planning their day's activities. It's starting to look like the playground scene in Alfred Hitchcock's "The Birds." You know the one--the crows are lined up on all the playground equipment and are looking menacing just before they swoop down on the unsuspecting children. Except that it's all boys on their bikes or scooters trying to figure out which mom to hit up first for snacks. Kirk, a natural leader (drat!), is gesturing toward my house--this can't be good for me!

I went to Costco the other day and took Hilary with me. She spent the entire trip sticking things in my cart, most of which I made her put back (she's 22 BTW), but she did manage to keep the giant bucket of Toll House Cookie Dough out of sight until I was at the check stand. I see the hand of fate here--I'll just make those up this morning and if the boys look like they're going to converge on my house I'll throw some cookies out the door at them. Perhaps if Tippi Hedren had had a few cookies to toss to the crows the movie wouldn't have given me nightmares for 20 years.

There is banging coming from my bedroom and I don't think it's the cats. Better go see...

The Wheels on the Bus

2007-10-08T11:08:00.000-07:00

Yes, this is the latest on Suzanne on the Bus. Look at that happy face...and the happy face of her best friend, Karissa, sitting behind her!

Greg was home today (Columbus Day--a rather useless bank holiday) so I made him go out and put her on the bus. Of course, he took a few photos while he was at it. She loves going to school and started nagging us as soon as Kirk left. She goes an hour later than him, so she gets a little irritated when he leaves the house and she doesn't. At one point this morning, she took off her jammies, put on her shoes, socks and jacket and tried to open the front door. I explained to her that she would be a bit chilly with no pants or shirt, so maybe we should trot up the stairs and do something about it. I guess it made sense because she scrambled up the stairs and went to her bedroom to start her morning ablutions!

School is going well now. She only had the one time out (she did not want to move to a new activity when it was time) and she hasn't walloped anyone lately. This is something that she learned from her brother and his friends. I have pointed out that she will not always be small and one day will be able to do quite a bit of damage to them. They think it is funny, but I am not amused...

She is learning to count objects up to 5, she is learning her colors, and she is starting to speak much more clearly. Greg is certain he heard her say "Where's Karissa?" this morning when they went out to the bus stop. I think she tosses in new words just to make sure we're paying attention to her.

What a strange day...Greg is here, but not really since he is upstairs on his computer and not making any noise. That cats have disappeared, probably upstairs with Greg. Perhaps I will send him an e-mail to get his attention. I could just yell up the stairs, but that would ruin the peaceful silence. Then again, Suzanne gets home in an hour and THAT will destroy the peaceful silence!

SpongeBob

2007-10-01T16:36:00.000-07:00

Have you ever seen one of those sponges with advertising that you get at the fair or the home show? The kind that are dry and flat and turn into regular sized sponges when you put a few drops of water on them. They grow before your very eyes and kids love them until they figure out that it only works one time and no amount of mashing with an iron is going to make it work again. Kirk grows like that--right before your very eyes. He's always been the tall kid and his pants never seem to be long enough. Top 95th percentile for height.

And then there is Suzanne... My Precious Peanut. My Little Ray of Sunshine. I'm proud to announce that at the age of 3 years 3 months, Suzanne has now climbed her way into the bottom 20th percentile for height and weight!! She is a whopping 28 1/2 lbs. and 35 inches tall!!

What she lacks in stature, she makes up for in personality...

Yesterday, in the pouring rain, we drove to Lake Oswego to participate in a Buddy Walk. The Buddy Walk was established by the National Down Syndrome Society in 1995 to celebrate Down Syndrome Awareness Month in October. It was the first time that we were around a lot of kids with DS and had the opportunity to chat with other parents. In spite of the weather, it was a great day and the kids had fun. These folks know how to throw a barbecue--in addition to hot dogs and burgers, they had a plate of PB&J which totally made Suzanne's day! A girl can stand soggy pants and being trapped in a stroller as long as she's got her PB&J and a bag of chips...

What we discovered is that we aren't the only ones with interesting and frustrating challenges. One family told us about their 8-year old son, Eli, who likes to call 911 operators--a lot. Suzanne has hit the redial a couple of times and called Grandma or Aunt Susan, but she's never actually called a stranger. Makes her poop nuggets seem not so bad.

It was just nice to meet parents with whom we immediately had something in common. Having a child with a disability is very isolating because your friends can't really relate to your struggles. For example, what do you do when your kids get home from school? You ask them how their day went. Unless they are a stinky adolescent, they will probably answer and you can have a conversation. Not so with Suzanne. She doesn't have the ability to answer that question yet, so I was totally in the dark about how school was going for her. Fortunately, I got an idea from another DS parent and we now send her with a notebook so the teacher can write notes about how things are going for her. It gives me a little peace of mind about what is happening while she's away from home.

I hear my little 35 inch whirlwind now...we take bets on what she'll be wearing and I'm betting on shirt but no pants. Kirk has just bellowed down the stairs and indeed, she is wearing no pants. Kirk thought she'd be totally nakey--I win again!

Let's Play HAWK-EY

2007-09-23T14:34:00.000-07:00

Have I ever mentioned that I love hockey? Oh sure, I had the usual snooty attitude of the uninitiated, those peaceniks who believe that hockey isn't so much a sport but rather another form of barbarism, not unlike the WWF or American Gladiators.

How wrong I was--hockey is nothing short of poetry on ice. It has all the qualities of a great sport--speed, agility, strength, strategy, sneaky plays--and you get to hit a little rubber nugget with a stick! The best part is that most of the time the players are skating BACKWARDS extremely fast. Each team has a goon, that is a player who engages in fisticuffs in order to teach the other team a lesson. This isn't an "official" position on the roster, but after the first few games of the season it becomes apparent who that person is. If the game isn't going well, he is the player to watch.

Friday was the first game of Western Hockey League (WHL) season. Our team is the Portland Winter Hawks...read the title of this blog again...and they play in the Memorial Coliseum. We took the kids and Hilary, as we've done many times before, but this game was different. For one thing, the Coliseum finally has booster seats available for the littler fannies. That would be Suzanne. I was walking around the concourse with Suzanne (because she doesn't like the opening ceremonies where they skate in to loud music and flashing lights) and she stopped to chat with the nice lady at the guest services booth. It was then that I noticed the stack of red plastic boxes and asked if those might indeed be booster seats. Voila! Suzanne could now sit in her own little seat and actually see over the bald man in front of her, enabling me to actually watch the game without getting wapped in the nose every time she decided to cheer. Here is the interesting part--Suzanne really likes to watch the game. She follows the players, yells when it is appropriate, and generally has a really nice time. In fact, she lasted almost the entire game before she pooped out and had to sit with me.

Which brings me back to the goon. My beloved niece, Hilary, comes to a lot of the games with us, and she's really starting to learn the rules. So much nicer to follow a game when you actually know what's going on. This particular game was more "active" than usual, probably because the Hawks were playing last year's Memorial Cup champions. They hung in there, but ultimately lost, and as the game went on it became apparent that the scuffles were going to be numerous. This really brought out the dark side of Hilary. Every time it looked like the gloves were going to come off, she'd jump to her feet and yell something totally goofy like "They're going to fight!" or "hit 'em again, hit 'em again!" I watched her with a bemused grin on my face, knowing that she had crossed over from the more gentlemanly sports and had become one of us.

Lest you think we are all barbarians, please understand that hockey players are dressed in full pads, much like the Michelin Man, and have to take their punches while on slippery ice. It's really hard to get in a good swing on skates. They are in more danger of getting hurt during the actual game when the pucks are flying around than when they are rolling around on the ice like those guys in the fake sumo wrestler suits.

Hilary was so excited to be there that she actually bought a lovely hooded sweatshirt in bright red with the Winter Hawks logo--for FULL PRICE! Did she wait, like her cheapskate auntie, until after the holidays when things go on sale? No, she didn't want to take a chance that they might run out of her size. Poor Hilary, she thinks stores run out of smalls and mediums. I'm here to tell you that the only size they run out of is my size, the Big Whopper. The skinny girls can always find something to wear.

I'm sure that Hilary will quickly figure out who the goon designee is. She's already learning the names of the players. There are the Canadian guys and the guys whose names end in "ski" "ov" or "uk." What a bummer that Robin Big Snake is no longer with the team--his name looked great on the back of a jersey!

Not a baby anymore

2007-09-19T15:16:00.000-07:00

Suzanne is officially a school girl. At 9:15 a.m. on Mon, Tue, Thu, Fri she gets on the bus to go to Hathaway Elementary Preschool. At 12:40 p.m. she comes home. So, for 3 hours I can do stuff. Get a pedicure, go shopping, read a book. I haven't actually done any of those things, but I could...I suppose.

In fact, during Suzanne's first 4 days, I went to the dentist twice, grabbed breakfast with a friend, and had one morning to myself. That was a little weird because Suzanne is either with me, with Greg, or a family member. To have her be with little kids who are (there's no way to say this gracefully) not like her is strange. She has been going to the PRIDE Center for 2 years, but that is a pre-preschool for kids like her. At PRIDE the playing field is even and all kids are nurtured, protected, and given the opportunity to grow by teams of specially-trained, caring professionals. I can see the benefit of her being in a regular school, but it's hard to not want to keep her in a protected environment. She's my baby, after all...

On the bright side (it's all bright for Suzanne), she loves the bus. She thinks the bus is the best part of the day. Since she is so small, I had them put a car seat in for her. She gets to sit right up front and high enough to see out of the window. The bus drivers can't help but smile when they see her dash for the bus door--she likes to be first. The neighbor girl, Karissa, goes to the same preschool and they are so cute together. To give you an idea of how small Suzanne is, she and Karissa have birthdays only 2 weeks apart. Karissa is 3 inches taller. I've got a beanstalk and a peanut for kids...

If you are interested in why we have Suzanne so deeply entrenched on the education trail, click on this link... Karen Gaffney Foundation She is Suzanne's role model and a great example of why parents should be their child's best advocate. We believe so fiercely in this young woman's purpose that we invited her to speak at the Camas-Washougal Rotary Club and then meet the superintendent of Washougal Schools. I'm a matchmaker at heart!

Now, all we have to do is get Suzanne to keep her shoes on while she's in the bus. I've got to find a shoe that she can't take off. Any suggestions?

The Shortest Miss America!

2007-09-12T13:01:00.000-07:00

Today I got to see just how far my little Suzanne has come in 3 short years. This morning we went to her preschool Open House for a little meet-n-greet and it was quite amusing. Let me just say that I am so proud of Suzanne that I'm all a twitter...

Suzanne just turned 3 in June, which makes her the youngest child in her class. She is also the smallest by far. To look at her, you might think that she was more immature and less able to handle the rigors of a classroom. You would be, however, completely wrong and in for a big surprise.

From the first second that we arrived, Suzanne owned the room. I mean OWNED. Sarah, Tammy, Ryan, you know what I mean. She sailed through the door in her little mini backpack, looked over the various work and play stations, found an appropriate baby doll to drag around, and proceeded to show those other kids how it's done. For those of you who thought she would never be able to sit still and complete a task, she worked at a table for 20 minutes today. She drank juice without dumping it on the table. She did not eat any crayons. And she took pity on one of her poor classmates who was bawling his little blue eyes out and gave him a big hug and a pat on the back. When we had to leave, she did her pageant wave to all her subjects and sailed out the door.

My kids spoil me sometimes. I have never known what it's like to have a shy or fearful child. Both of mine are so gregarious and outgoing, completely at ease in most social situations (although Kirk is getting a little squirrly about girls).

I can hardly wait for tomorrow to see how she likes the bus. I may actually follow them in the car, not because I'm fearful of the bus, but because I want to see her when she gets off and marches into her classroom. Washougal School District--look out, here comes Suzanne!!

Mighty OR-EE-GUN!

2007-09-04T09:48:00.000-07:00

Subtitle: The Day Suzanne Tried to Kill Grammy and Bampa...

My folks are great. Any time I need them, they are right there for me. Like Saturday. Greg & Kirk wanted to go a University of Oregon football and I actually got invited this year. Normally they do a father/son sort of a deal, but Greg is getting the idea that I need to get out more. Anyway, he worked it out with Mom & Dad so that they would come up for Labor Day weekend and stay with Suzanne while we went to the UofO game on Saturday.

This was an absolutely great idea...quality time with the grandparents, blah blah...until you really started to look at the logistics. My parents are in their 70s (not decrepit of course, but the warranty is starting to wear out). I have a house with stairs and Mom has bad knees. And Suzanne is...well...Suzanne!

To show you how desperate I am, I thought through all of this and then erased it from my mind the second we got in the car to leave that morning. The idea of spending a sunny day at Autzen Stadium with my son and his rather intense Duck alum father was just more than I could pass up. So off we went, with the legions of UofO fans who reside in the Portland metro area, down to Eugene to watch PAC 10 football.

My apologies to Barbara--the Ducks beat the University of Houston 48 to 27. Your guys probably played a better game, but this was game of quantity over quality.

Anyway, there is nothing like college football to bring out the crazies. This guy for example. Kirk took this picture from the backseat of the truck--you only see the front of his RV, the back has a backside shot of Donald and a few other choice words.

The problem with having green and yellow school colors is that you get a whole lotta ugly going on at the pregame party. Mr. Tie-Dye was the worst I think. Not only was it the standard yellow and green, he was obviously a Eugene resident as he had the hippie thing going on as well. I thought my eyes were going to start bleeding...

I managed to make it through with the help of a lovely pregame libation (or two). See, you have to get a buzz on before you go into the stadium, just in case the Ducks do their Jekyll and Hyde thing and win the game for the other team.

All in all it was a fine day and when we got home my parents were still amongst the living, although just barely. Suzanne did her best to run them ragged, but in the end it was still two against one. I have to hand it to Dad, he did something that he rarely does. He danced with Suzanne all day long. He danced more on Saturday than he has in his entire life and he's finally found someone who can deal with his...uh, quirky...sense of rhythm. I think he knows all the words to "Wheels on the Bus" now, too! Gotta love a guy like that!

They left this morning to go home. They didn't exactly run out of the door (who can run after the weekend they've had) but they did hustle a bit. Mom said it was because they needed to get to the dog kennel to get Albert, but I'm pretty sure they wanted to go home and rest up before Thanksgiving. We're coming...with Suzanne...and she'll have new tricks to pull by then!

Nag, Nag, Nag

2007-08-30T11:50:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know it's been fully a month since my last post. My apologies, loyal readers, but I've been busy. It is summer and my rugrats hardly give me a moment to pee, much less do anything requiring coherent thought. Here are the highlights of August...

1. I have adopted two more children. Their names are Ben & Jerry. They are not the two-legged kind, and in fact they have no legs at all right now. They are tadpoles. Kirk and his buddy Cameron came home with Ziplocs filled with creek water and itty bitty swimmy things. I kind of thought it was just gunky creek water until I noticed the little eyes on something that looked like a piece of bark. I left them in the baggies on the patio table overnight, and when I went to throw their dead carcasses out the next morning, I discovered that 2 were still amongst the living. I'm not totally heartless, so I pitched them in the sandbox, which was partially filled with rainwater, and forgot about them for another day. The next day, the kitties found them swimming merrily in their new environment and I figured if they could live through kitties whacking at them, they deserved a little better treatment. I did a little research, put more water in the sandbox, and every day or so I toss bits of lettuce and a few kitty kibbles in there. They are getting bigger all the time and have learned to hide amongst the rocks (I'm decorating their environment now...) when Oscar and Emmy loom over the side of the box. Hopefully in another few weeks I'll have frogs. Kirk has told me we will take them back to the creek to "release into the wilderness." His words, not mine.

2. We went to the Clark County Fair. My lovely niece, Hilary, decided that week to become a vegan (she's rather impulsive). This only lasted until she found the hand-dipped corn dogs and elephant ears. After a rousing bout of indigestion, she decided that going from no fat to high fat was a mistake and that perhaps she should have slid into her new lifestyle a little more gradually seeing as how it was fair week. I offered to get her a deep fried Twinkie so her fair food experience would be complete, but for some reason she wasn't interested. BTW, a few days later she decided that being a vegan was not really for her and that perhaps she'd just go with eating a low fat/low carb diet instead. This seems to be working out better.

3. Kirk went to baseball camp. This is a camp put on by the Portland Beavers, a farm team for the San Diego Padres. I took him during rush hour to downtown Portland (PGE Park). After we checked him in and saw that he was having a good time, Suzanne and I hopped on the train to go shopping. We went to Saks and Tiffany's, looked in the windows, then got serious and went to Baby Gap and Gymboree to look for a birthday present for cousin Landon who turned 1 on August 29th. We found an adorable outfit with wiener dogs on it (shout out if you remember Bitsy and Mandy!) and then hopped the train back to the park. Turns out I'm a fare thief. I thought the ballpark was in Fareless Square, but I guess it stops at 12th avenue. The park is on 18th Avenue. I wonder what the fare is for 6 blocks?

Did I mention that Suzanne does not like jackhammers? There was a lot of work being done when we were shopping and Suzanne liked none of it. She vastly preferred being at the ballpark and getting to run around the beer yard (unfortunately at 11 a.m. there was no beer to be had anywhere...). No I'm not corrupting my daughter, that is just where they had the parents wait on the field. There is a Widmer beer garden by the first base line. It is a fine place to watch a game and you can catch a lot of balls there.

My next blogs will probably be devoted to preschool countdown. She starts school on the 13th. She's going to ride the bus. Kirk starts 2nd grade tomorrow, but big whoop--he's an old hand at it. When we took him to the open house last week to meet his teacher, he was sauntering down the hall like he owned the place. "Hey dude, how's yer summer?" "Peace out, dude!" That kind of thing. This "dude" thing is really starting to annoy me.

Gotta go check on Ben & Jerry--the cats are out...

Gardening and Life

2007-07-30T10:41:00.000-07:00

Ah the joys of gardening! A garden is the microcosm of life, wouldn't you agree? You plant a seed, water it, nurture it, and it blooms into a lovely flower! Just like children. And just like children, some of these flowers never go away, they just keep reappearing year after year in places that you don't want them to be. And just like children, they attract bugs and you have to buy expensive stuff to clean them up. And just like children, if they are unhappy, they let you know it.

When I think about it like that, I don't think I'll go into the back yard ever again...

Plants have to be tough to survive in my yard. Considering that I live in the greenest state in the country, I have some inhospitable conditions in my yard. I have spots that are super shady with bad drainage. I have one corner that is like the Sahara Desert. I have an interesting collection of weeds that sprout up overnight. I'm in serious need of soil amendments. And I have Suzanne.

Because of our trip to the beach, Suzanne has discovered the joys of digging. She now likes to dig anywhere. She even snatched my long weed poker (is there a name for that thing?) and decided to have her way with the petunias. And the lobelia. She was on her way to the clematis when I stopped her, which was fortunate because the stupid plant never bloomed last year and won't stop blooming this year. I've tried to reason with Suzanne and let her pick the alyssum, which has come up everywhere this year. If she can get rid of some of that, I'd be thrilled--last year's mistake lives on and on.

She has dined on quite a few blooms, which has lead me to a frenzy of research to see if any of it is poisonous (I'm in the clear on that).

I have some flowers that I can't identify because she picks the buds when she sees them. And the delphinium in corner quivers when she walks by because she's already beheaded him once this summer. He grew a new stalk, but we'll see he can make it to bloom this time...

A love of gardening starts early. Mine started when I buried my glasses under the petunias when I was 3 or 4. I think that Suzanne and I will share a love a of gardening..some day...after she outgrows the urge to pick everything she sees. That she gets from her dad--he thinks everything is a weed! After he pulled up the peonies one spring (before they had blooms--it just looked like a bush to him) I forbade him from ever pulling anything out of the ground without my express permission.

It occurs to me that there is a space where the foxglove used to be...wanna bet one of them had something to do with it?

We're having a heatwave...

2007-07-11T14:20:00.000-07:00

We're having a heat wave,

A tropical heat wave,

The temperature's rising,

It isn't surprising,

She certainly can can-can.

She started a heat wave

By letting her seat wave

In such a way that

The customers say that

She certainly can can-can.

Is there anyone besides my mother who recognizes the song stylings of Irving Berlin? No? Too bad, that man had quite the way with words. Rappers would do well to take some lessons from him!

It was 104 degrees yesterday and today it is supposed to be cooler at about 100 degrees. Suzanne has decided that playing outside is not high on her list of things to do. She wouldn't even go to the mailbox with me. She insisted that she ride in her little red car while I pushed. Then she went and banged on the neighbors' door to let her in since I was taking too much time watering the droopy flowers.

Suzanne will never know the joys of living in a house sans air conditioning. Mainly because I will have air conditioning until my dying day. I like to be cool and I don't mind paying for it. And since we have a 2-story house, it is pretty much a necessity if you plan on actually getting any sleep at night.

Today I met with her old physical therapist to see about getting some fixes for her new tricycle. Grandma and Grandpa Hunter got Suzanne the Cadillac of tricycles for her birthday, but of course her little legs are still too short to reach the pedals. Ryan came through, however, and with the aide of a pool noodle, a drill, and some velcro, we now have a functional vehicle for her. Sounds crazy, but I'll take some pictures later to show you how it works. Half the battle for Suzanne is me knowing the right people to talk to when I have questions about these kinds of things.

I would take the pictures today, but it is HOT so we'll have to wait for Suzanne to decide that she wants to go out again. Maybe when it gets down to 90...

The good fireworks are in Washougal

2007-07-10T10:50:00.000-07:00

What a whirlwind week it's been! The 4th of July was wonderful with lots of fireworks. Suzanne didn't like all the booming, but she enjoyed the barbecue at the neighbors. Then there was Kirk's birthday party at the Portland Beavers baseball game on Sunday. The Beavers are a Triple A farm team for the San Diego Padres, so the talent level is pretty high. There was even a home run hit completely out of the park. Of course, the innocent motorist driving by on SE 18th probably didn't appreciate getting whacked by a baseball very much...

I guess I take Suzanne for granted, but all the people we were with were astonished at her ability to have fun and pay attention during a 9 inning game. It was even an afternoon game, during prime napping time, but Suzanne didn't start to fade until the 8th, and then a walk around the concourse cured that. Of course, she was asleep within 2 minutes of getting into the car but heck, we were only going home.

Actually, we are quite blessed with both of our kids. On more than one occasion, we have gotten the "you're bringing your kids?" gasp, but our kids usually manage to impress and amaze onlookers. Oh, perfect little angels they are not, but stick them in public where there is fun to be had and they rise to the occasion. My kids like to go places and they know that if they don't behave, they stay home. All I ever have to do it threaten to cut Kirk off from his social activity and he snaps right back in line. Turns out that Suzanne is much the same way.

I suppose this could also mean that it is downright dull at home and anywhere else is a step up...

Tomorrow Suzanne gets to participate in a professional photo shoot for her alma mater, the PRIDE Center. Part of what they have to do is schmooze for funding, so they are taking happy kid photos at their wonderful playground. Since Suzanne looks happy about 90 percent of the time, she'll be a good model. She's been in a couple of these all ready, which would explain why she always knows to look in the camera and smile. She's getting quite the Cheshire Cat grin.

Suzanne sells seashells by the seashore

2007-07-01T17:01:00.000-07:00

We have returned from the seashore! From Seaside, Oregon actually, and it was quite fun. The last time we took the kids to the beach, Suzanne was 3 months old. This time was a lot of fun and Kirk now has something good to write about his summer vacation...

Monday was a beach day. Suzanne liked the ocean, but she liked digging better. She also spent quite a bit of time eating the sand. I guess something is missing in her diet like clam shells or sand dollars or kelp. Kirk went straight for the waves. If you find a red ball with yellow stars bobbing in the waves, that's ours. We lost it the very first day...

Tuesday was a town day. For those of you not familiar with Seaside, it has a rich history as a tourist attraction. That is a nice way of saying that it is kind of a tacky little town with odd things to do. Actually, it is much nicer than it used to be, but the bumper cars are still a must-see. In fact, Grandpa Frank probably had more fun than anyone on the bumper cars.

Then we had a traditional Hunter/Brown family meal at the venerable Pig-n-Pancake. My mom and I would go here every day, but my sister believes that one trip is enough. They have umpty-bazillion kinds of pancakes--how can one visit possibly be enough?

We even managed to squeeze in Suzanne's first ride on the merry-go-round. About half-way through the ride she quit clutching cousin Hilary's neck and decided it was a fun thing.

The next day was excursion day with a trip down to Tillamook to go to the Naval Air Museum and the famous Tillamook Cheese Factory. Needless to say, the cheese factory was the highlight as it involved tasting, one of Suzanne's favorite activities. If you're ever there, don't hesitate to try the Wild Huckleberry ice cream. The other berries pale in comparison...

Thursday was a shopping/rain day. Mom and I took the kids up to Gearhart to a lovely cafe called Pacific Way Bakery & Cafe. The crab and artichoke ravioli was so good I nearly snorted it down. Suzanne had a grilled cheese panini and thought it was wonderful. From Hwy 101 north or south, take the Gearhart City Center turn. Go to the first stop sign and park. Don't worry, there's only the one stop sign so it's easy to find. When you hit the ocean, you've gone too far...

Gosh, I'm getting hungry again as I write this travelogue. I will end with another wonderful Greg Brown picture, Kirk at Sunset...

A River in Egypt

2007-06-22T09:27:00.000-07:00

My gosh, it's been weeks since I've posted! I could go on about how busy it's been with the end of the school year or getting ready for vacation, or some other blather, but what it really boils down to is my baby is getting older and I'm in denial...deeeeeep denial...about the whole thing.

Suzanne turned 3 last Sunday. Her last day of baby school was Monday and her last speech/PT was Thursday. Now she enters the world of "Public School." It's just that she's been so protected within the Early Intervention sphere and especially at PRIDE that I'm having a little difficulty with the thought of my little precious mixing and mingling with kids who aren't like her. Reverse snobbery in a way.

Greg's mom came to see us for Suzanne's birthday, which was nice. I managed to get a cake made while they were out buying Pat a new car. We took a drive to try out the GPS system, went to have some Mexican food and just had a nice evening. Sunday was much the same. Here are some before/after pictures of Suzanne...

BTW, Pat--you should come see us more often. You are a good influence on your son. He went out and bought a headboard for the guest bed just because you were coming. If you came more often I would probably get all of my household projects done!!

I've got more pictures of Suzanne's last day at PRIDE coming--my photographer/husband hasn't had time to photoshop them yet. I really can't say enough about all the wonderful folks at PRIDE. They care so much about the little kids and it shows. Suzanne went to her preschool visitation this week and totally took over the joint. She blew away the 3 teachers with her independence and self assurance. They might have thought she was going to be a demure, sweet little girl, but they quickly figured out that Suzanne will keep them on top of their game because she demands excellence from everyone she meets. And she does it with a smile and a hug.

I may be in denial about Suzanne turning 3, but Suzanne is more than ready to go out and conquer the Washougal Preschool Program.

2 good days...

2007-06-06T11:27:00.000-07:00

Suzanne's birthday is looming. She will be 3 on June 17th and I can hardly believe it. On her first birthday (when this picture was taken with her Aunt Susan) she couldn't even pull herself up on the furniture--now she's climbing to the ceiling. "To Infinity & Beyond!" as Buzz Lightyear says.

Yesterday she followed a 2-part instruction. We were in my bedroom and she kept trying to close the door on me. I told her, partly in sign, to leave the door open and find her brother. She had to think about it for a second, but then she did what I asked!! If I get a couple of these little victories every day, we'll really be making some progress.

She also invented a new game. She took her baby doll and stood her up against the wall. Then she took one of Kirk's baseballs and tried to play catch. Turns out that when the ball hit the baby, it rolled back to her. She played this way for quite a while. Then she decided to try whacking the baby's head with the ball. Good thing the baby has a hard head...

Today she is mad at me. She wanted to use her play table to climb to the top of her dresser, so her mean old mommy just took the legs off the table. If you heard a lot of booing and hooing from the direction of Washougal, that was her. She is now consoling herself by sitting on my bed and watching Martha Stewart. She chose the channel, not me. I think she is really starting to take after her Aunt Susie!

What's In a Name...

2007-06-04T08:00:00.000-07:00

It is such an exciting moment in a parent's life when their darling child begins to speak. Kirk started talking in earnest at 18 months and has yet to shut up about anything. He is at ease in nearly every situation and is quite deft at expressing himself. In fact, he's yakking at me while I type this--it's all about the Relay for Life, which he and Greg participated in last weekend. They camped out all night and he played with his friends and slept under the stars, and checked out the luminaria, and played with his friends...yadda, yadda, yadda.

Suzanne talks a lot, but mainly in Russian. At least it sounds like Russian. She has a lot of single words, but doesn't put them together very much. In fact, her first word was "dada," which totally made Greg's day 2 years ago when she said it. She is learning everyone's name, too--except for mine. I don't know why she won't say "mama" because usually M sounds are easier. She says "me" and "maymen" which actually means amen. Gosh, she can say "Kirkie" which has got to be harder than "mama" and Ok for Oscar. She can even say Emmy (more Ms). Maybe it's because she's with me so much that I just blend into the scenery.

Whatever it is, I'm finding myself getting a little impatient at the wait. She's going to be 3 this month, which is astonishing. She's made tremendous progress in her life, with this one exception, so I shouldn't get too torn up about it. And it makes her daddy feel good every time she runs to the door to welcome him home after work. I should be content with that, right?

I've settled for a lot of things in my life, but this is not an area where I want to settle or make do. I want my daughter to recognize me as a person who is important to her, not just a presence in the background. I think a lot of women settle for being that presence in the background, but when you do that you're relegating yourself to the status of the furniture or the wallpaper. You start to become invisible to others and to yourself. The old saying is that children should be seen and not heard--it doesn't say anything about mothers...

Suzanne Van GO!

2007-06-02T10:05:00.000-07:00

Want to know what awful thing Suzanne did yesterday? Well, I'm not going to tell you!! It was such a horror that I don't want to relive it. Suffice it to say that while the floor is now clean, I will be chipping the dried pancake batter off the kitchen chairs and an end table for awhile longer.

The good news is that she may have some artistic talent. The "finger paints" on the end table are nice and swirly if you don't take into account the actual medium...

Needless to say, this is what I looked like yesterday. In fact, this is how I look on most days anymore. The Makeover Queen needs her own makeover...

I think that there is a book missing in my repertoire of Down Syndrome material. Most of what I've seen talks about the physical symptoms of DS or the mental issues or other clinical stuff. Then there are the plethora of "feel good" books about what a wonderful and uplifting privilege it is to have a child with DS. That is true--it is a wonderful privilege to have a DS child. To a point...

I have yet to find a book that talks about navigating the day-to-day, mind boggling, spirit crushing onslaught of activity that I find myself inundated with. (Sorry about ending the sentence with a preposition--I really couldn't care less.) The point is, there should be some kind of manual or guidelines that lays things out. Some helpful hints like Heloise used to dispense...

For example, "Beware of hardwood floors. They do not provide resistance when child is learning to crawl and when they can walk, hardwood is merely another item on which to bonk one's head." Or how about, "At first birthday, gather all relatives and friends to help install ceiling shelves. Begin moving all items, including cotton balls, liquids, and kleenex to upper storage, completing task on or before 2nd birthday."

It should also contain a list of things you should get by the caseload, such as packing tape and bungee cords. You will use these to tape and strap shut EVERYTHING that cannot be suspended from the ceiling. And let us not forget the doorknobs. If you have the lever kind that are so popular now, plan on replacing each and every one of them with the round, slick kind. And put deadbolts or chains on every door, inside and out. Step stools or kitchen ladders--get rid of them immediately!!! I don't care if your spouse has to toss you in the air like a cheerleader to get the olive oil off of the ceiling shelf--DS kids do not need any help in the climbing department.

And chairs or sofas in general--you might want to consider replacing your furniture with a mattress and some beanbag chairs.

Well, that's all for now folks. I'll get started on the topic of Yard & Garden Safety at another time!

But seriously, folks...

2007-05-24T07:28:00.000-07:00

Big sigh! I am feeling every bit of my 47 years today. My joints ache, everything is sagging, and if it weren't for coffee, I'd have no incentive to get up in the morning. Suzanne did something yesterday that I still can hardly believe and yet... I take yesterday's event as conclusive proof that God does exist and that He sends angels to keep track of children with an extraordinary ability to get into hair-raising situations.

I think we've established the fact that Suzanne is a climber. If not, let me say emphatically that Suzanne can climb anything she sets her mind to. We shut a lot of doors around here just to keep her out of and off of things. Suzanne has also embraced the door shutting. She hasn't mastered opening yet, but it is just a matter of time and about 1 more inch in height.

My lovely niece, Hilary, stays with us a couple nights a week and yesterday morning she was hustling around getting ready for work. While she understands Suzanne's capabilities, in the rush of getting to work on time she usually manages to forget something and this week it was the closing of the upstairs doors. The guest bathroom is not a place that Suzanne gets to go that often, especially now that she has forsaken her potty chair (momentarily I hope). That was the door that my darling Hil left open. After she left, Suzanne took it upon herself to go upstairs and check, and sure enough--the forbidden bathroom was wide open. Her bedroom door was also open, so she obligingly closed it and then marched down the hall to the bathroom.

I was in the bedroom folding the never-ending mass of laundry and heard doors closing, which didn't alarm me. In fact, I looked out in the hall, saw Suzanne's door was closed and assumed she was on the inside playing--this happens all the time. It wasn't until I heard the water and the yelling that I realized she was in the bathroom.

Let me cast the vision for you...the guest bathroom has no window. Suzanne shuts the door and is enveloped in total darkness, except for the crack at the bottom of the door. Then, she climbs up on the toilet (Kirk is a fanatic about keeping the lid down). Then, in darkness, she climbs up on the counter and then into the sink where she gets stuck in the basin like an upside down turtle. Then she turns on the water, gets all wet, and turns it off again. This is when I find her babbling merrily away.

She could have fallen off the counter, she could have turned on the hot water, it could have turned out very badly. As I said earlier, there are angels who watch over children, and Suzanne's angel gets quite a workout.

I realize that most folks (including my family) who spend actual time with me think I'm somewhat of a shrill alarmist when it comes to Suzanne. Well, I'm not an alarmist and if people would take me seriously, I wouldn't have to be so shrill. This is what happens when you spend your entire life making people laugh--no one takes you seriously.

I'm not asking for much. Just shut a few doors, keep your purses out of reach, and be aware that it only takes a second for Suzanne to think up something new. You don't have to take me seriously (I'm only the mother, right?) but DO NOT underestimate Suzanne.

Suzanna and the 'Ventures

2007-05-21T07:49:00.000-07:00

My kids lead an interesting life. It's not so much that we lavish spendy toys on them or take them on luxurious vacations, we just DO stuff with them. When Kirk was little he called his weekend outings with daddy his "'ventures." For those of you who don't recognize Kirk's tendency to chop off the first syllable of words, this means adventures. He had such a cute way of speaking when he was 3, either dropping or adding first syllables... (re)mote, (con)troller, rememberies (memories), (Ken)Tucky Fried Chicken. Now he's quite sanctimonious about pronouncing words correctly. I miss the syllable dropping...

Kirk's weekend 'ventures started at 9 a.m. Saturday with a 1.5K run for the Washougal Schools Foundation. Then he had little league at 1 p.m. followed by a camping trip to The Dalles after that. While at The Dalles they went to a train slide show (which I won't bother to explain for those of you who aren't into trains), he saw his friends the Pohlls and the Shaws, slept in the back of the pickup, had breakfast at his train Grandma's and then came home.

Suzanne and I had a girls weekend. Went went to the run with Kirk and cheered him on as he crossed the finish line. Then she helped me pull some weeds in the garden. We didn't go to the game because she was cranky and it was in the middle of nap time. After a long nap I painted her toenails bright orange (no pale pink for my Suzanne!) and then we played until it was time to go to dinner with my Aunt Connie. Aunt Connie recently returned from a 2 week trip to the South of France and she had lots of pictures and vivid descriptions of everything she did. Aunt Connie has never been out to dinner with Suzanne, so she was pleasantly surprised at how well she behaved.

The interesting part of dinner was the booster seat. Suzanne usually gets to sit in a high chair because high chairs have seat belts. Seat belts which confine children to a particular spot and which keep them from sliding under the table and escaping. Booster seats rarely have seat belts. Suzanne did really well until she was finished with her dinner and started looking for a new 'venture. Only then did she realize that she was free to slide under the table and head out on her own. She was so silent about it that if she hadn't touched my pant leg, I might not have noticed until she was helping the hostess seat the guests! Now, neither my aunt nor my niece, who were sitting facing her, saw a thing. Suzanne is shaping up to be a really good escape artist.

There is a reason that I put Suzanne in a cart whenever I'm at a store. If no carts are available, she goes in her stroller. Greg thought he could take her through the grocery store on foot a couple of weeks back. Ha Ha Ha...nice try, honey! She protested every inch of the way and pitched a little fit when his hands were full of stuff, then sat down and refused to move. She wanted to go where she wanted to go and at least if she's in a cart, you can roll her in spite of the protesting.

After dinner we ended up at Fred Meyer (a one stop shopping center, for those of you who don't live on the west coast). You see some interesting people at 9 p.m. on a Saturday--not the creepy types, they hang out at Walmart. You can tell who has a date and are getting provisions vs. those who do not have a date and are just buying comfort food to take home. And then there are the people watchers like Suzanne and me. She had a pretty good time until exactly 9:27, then it was time to go home. I could tell because she kept making the sign for "go" and yelling it at the top of her lungs. She did her pageant wave past the line of checkers (who all waved back) and we sailed out the door, drove home, and she went to bed. A fine evening it was!

So you see, you can have adventures wherever you go if you're with the right person. Suzanne is the girl to have adventures with!

It's not how you start, it's how you finish!

2007-05-18T10:53:00.000-07:00

"Song Titles for $100, Alex!"

For those of you who have never been to a big Mary Kay event, you might not have heard this song. Too bad for you, since it has a nice beat and you can dance to it! And while the message is a bit schmaltzy, it is very true--it's not how you start, it's how you finish.

Suzanne is a prime example. She had a rather humble beginning at only 6 lbs. 11 0z. To give you a little perspective, she's wearing a 0 to 3 month dress and she is just swimming in it. In fact, the bloomers wouldn't even stay on her little fanny because she was so scrawny. We probably should have gotten a few preemie outfits just so we didn't lose her in her clothes!

But I'm not really thinking that much about Suzanne today. She's booing and hooing in her bedroom right now because her mean mommy thinks she needs an early nap. Too bad Sister! You're just going to have to trust that I know what's best for you...

No, I'm really thinking about someone else who is equally special to me. Today I'm thinking a lot about my dad. My dad and I have always had a special relationship--I was the one who would go fishing with him, but I wouldn't touch the worms or the fish. I'd go to the dump with him, but he wouldn't let me heave the trash over the side. And I was the only one who had the patience to help him hitch up the trailer that I talked him into buying. I was 8 at the time.

He has a very special anniversary this month, which epitomizes my phrase of the day, "it's not how you start, it's how you finish." You see, my dad made a decision 20 years ago that not only changed his life, it changed all of ours too. Because of his decision to change his life, my kids have the best grandfather that I could ever ask for. My parents celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary last November, but I think this ranks right up there as equally momentous.

Greg, the kids and I are going on vacation with my parents in June. In fact, we do this every couple of years because we like being together. 20 years ago this never would have happened, but now my son gets to look forward to taking his grandpa on the bumper cars in Seaside. The big joke is that my family likes to travel in packs. We've been on 2 cruises with them (3 for Susan and Jim) and another fun trip to the beach (6 days, 7 adults, 2 kids, 1 dog, 1 house, no fatalities). We enjoy each other's company--imagine that.

So Dad, know that you are loved and appreciated. And please forgive me for putting the idea in Kirk's head about the bumper cars...

Dancing Queen Bee

2007-05-15T08:43:00.000-07:00

Suzanne has definite likes and dislikes with regard to televised entertainment. She...

Likes real people
Dislikes cartoons
Likes shows with color and action
Dislikes slowness
Likes Elmo
Dislikes Cookie Monster (how do you not like Cookie Monster?)
Likes any show that requires clapping and cheering

LOVES Dancing With the Stars!

I think this falls under the category of color and action. She also really likes hockey. I don't even want to think about that...

Last night we were watching DWTS and Suzanne was doing her best impression of Arthur Murray. When she sees the dancers she actually tries to imitate them. I'm certain that dance will be a huge part of Suzanne's life if we find the right class and instructor who understands the mechanics of a child with Down Syndrome. Just because she can do the splits both ways doesn't mean that it is necessarily a good thing. The object is to build strength in all of her muscle groups, which Ryan (our beloved physical therapist) has been working on for nearly 2 years now. She can do some amazing things and she's learning more all the time.

In fact, I caught her walking up and down the bleachers during Kirk's baseball game last night. Two weeks ago she was too scared of falling underneath to even try it and now she would scramble right up to the top if I'd let her. She does have a problem with the visual aspect of going down things, but when she gets the hang of it, watch out!

And so I think of things like tutus and tights and all the fun things that girls should get to do when they're little. Even I got to be a ballerina once and it is something I've always remembered fondly. I'm not sure my mother remembers it that fondly--from what I understand those costumes were a real pain to make!

Suzanne is going to have a lot of things happen in her life in the next few months, what with preschool and anything else I can find to shave the tomboy edges off of her. Perhaps I'll get to be a baseball/dance mom--I can but dream!

Jennie

PS - the weather is getting nice so get outside and plant some flowers--it is very therapeutic. Except you folks in Klamath Falls--you should wait a couple more weeks. Do what I'm constantly telling Suzanne...wait, wait!!

The Children We Deserve

2007-05-11T09:28:00.000-07:00

Not long after Suzanne was born we got a call from someone who told us that God had given us what we deserved. This remark was intended to hurt us, but since it came from a very sick person, we considered the source and blew it off. Her loss, because Suzanne is a little ray of sunshine to everyone she meets. We will never allow her to be a part of Suzanne's life because Suzanne deserves to receive as much love as she gives.

I have pondered this remark from time to time, though, and while this person meant it in a cruel way, there is a lot of truth to it. In many ways I think we get kids who are way too good for us and our challenge is to raise them without botching it up too much. Take Kirk for example--he has a natural honesty and frankness about him that is both shocking and endearing. Like the time he and Greg went to Bi-Mart to buy another plunger. (We had 3 toilets and only 2 plungers and I firmly believe that each toilet deserves its own plunger.) Anyway, as they were checking out, Kirk strikes up a conversation with the cashier and calmly informs her that they were buying the plunger "because Daddy overloads the toilet." Poor Greg--I'm not sure he's ever been back to Bi-Mart since then! The question is, how do we teach Kirk tact and discretion without squelching the very thing that makes him so interesting?

And then there's Suzanne. This has been a week of huge learning, but at the same time we are trying to teach her boundaries. The two don't go together as far as Suzanne is concerned. I was mulling this over awhile back when we met another couple with 2 children. The mother is a lovely young woman who takes issue with germs--she would never allow the 5 second rule. Most of us get over the cleanliness issue with the second child, but I doubt that she ever will. Hey, she has the kind of nice clean home that I can only dream about so more power to her.

But I was thinking about how it would be if Suzanne were her daughter. I don't think she would fare very well with Suzanne because Suzanne insists upon controlling her own environment. I have given up on controlling Suzanne's environment, it's just not feasible. About the second time she found poop nuggets all over the bedroom floor we'd probably have to ship her off to the spa for some aromatherapy and a relaxing facial.

So I guess in some ways we do get the children we deserve. I may not like Suzanne's learning process or the control she has over my life, but I can live with it (grumbling all the way...).

And speaking of the spa, should anyone in my viewing audience wish to take pity on me, please nominate me for a makeover at http://1041thefish.com/makeovermonday.aspx . I could nominate myself, but that seems a bit pathetic. Alright, begging for nominations on a blog is equally pathetic but I have no dignity left.

(sigh....) Let's go see what Suzanne has in store for me today!

Patience, jackass, patience...

2007-05-07T18:34:00.000-07:00

I am a lousy joke teller. Don't get me wrong--I think I'm quite humorous and witty when it comes to off the cuff remarks and the occasional practical joke. But to sit and tell jokes? Not my forte. I can never seem to remember the joke right or I get the punchline backwards. In fact I can only remember about 3 jokes and one ends with the line, "Patience, jackass, patience.

I am telling myself this several times a day lately. Because life with Suzanne requires superhuman patience at times. Especially when it comes to the potty training. And as you know from a previous post, I am up to my eyeballs in poop.

As I was shampooing the carpet in Suzanne's room today (2 potty accidents) I kept muttering, "patience, jackass, patience." Pretty funny if you know that there are two slang names for mule--one is jackass and the other is Jenny. Yup! In fact, my great grandma Jenny was appalled to find out that I would be named after her since she had gone through a lot of name calling when she was young. And I have been accused on more than one occasion of being as stubborn as a mule. I think my parents got it right when they named me...

So, I suppose I should just fall back on my inate stubborness, keep chanting, and hope that sooner or later she takes an interest in the potty chair as something other than a nice place to sit next to the tub. If I can ever figure out what her primary motivator is, I'll have it made!!!!

Pet Peeves

2007-05-04T19:47:00.000-07:00

It's been a busy week. Suzanne's been on a tear and I've been waiting impatiently for my new computer to arrive. It came yesterday. Today Suzanne was her little poopy, obnoxious self, but it didn't get out of hand mainly because I was where I could keep my beady eyes on her and still get something done. In fact, I am typing this from the kitchen as she is wailing because the pizza isn't getting done fast enough. Nothing is ever fast enough for a 2 year old.

I've had some people ask me lately what I thought of the early intervention system. My first comment would be that it all depends. It depends on who you are talking to at the time. In general, the teachers that we have encountered are wonderful. Where the trouble begins is when you are talking to someone about your IFSP (more on acronyms later) and the person has never actually met your child. Yes, Oregon people, it happens this way in Washington. The nice woman assigned as our Family Services Coordinator had never actually met Suzanne until she was at the PRIDE center for something totally unrelated to Suzanne. I find it hard to believe that someone can coordinate services without even a brief introduction to the child in question. Now, I am an educated, sensible person but even I have had difficulty navigating the early intervention system. I can only imagine how hard it must be for someone else who doesn't have the support that I do.

1, Sometimes you just don't know what to ask for. As if it weren't tough enough being on the emotional rollercoaster that we all find ourselves on, you also need a degree in early childhood education to figure out what to ask for.

2. The Emotional Rollercoaster. Suzanne is almost 3 and still I'm on the emotional rollcoaster with her. On the one hand, Iwant people to know about Suzanne and all the wonderful things she can do. On the other hand, I want her to be treated like any other kid. I want her to be like any other kid. Now, I know that the various therapies are going to help us get to the point where she is just like everyone else, but I've also seen parents who resist therapies out of fear that it marks their child as "different." I guess I have it easier because my kid is different and there is no changing it--just look into her almond shaped eyes and there it is. The Emotional Rollercoaster is deadly--it can make you fear the very thing that will help your child the most.

3 The Acronyms. Please, if you are a teacher or therapist or Family Service Coordinator do not use an acronym for everything. I've just gotten the hang of the original bunch and now at age 3, we have another bunch to learn. Gads!!! I have enough to do without having to learn a new language every couple of years...

All in all, I'd have to say that I'm pleased with Suzanne's walk through the early intervention system. She has benefitted mightily. I, on the other hand, haven't enjoyed it quite so much. If I didn't have Ryan to pick on, I wouldn't be having any fun at all....

Delay is not Denial

2007-05-01T09:31:00.000-07:00

What is a developmental delay anyway?

Women, in general, are very familiar with the concept of developmental delays because most men suffer from them at least part of the time. I call this occurrence a "Football Season Induced Delay." A perfectly normal 40 year old man will, at the beginning of ESPN College Game Day, become a Dorito gobbling, soda swilling, insult hurling ogre of a 13 year old. This condition worsens when actual tailgate barbecue smoke is inhaled.

(Of course, my Gregory doesn't fall into this category. He never loses his sense of dignity or decorum. Except during the January 1989 Superbowl (XXIII) when he broke the couch. We blame this on Joe Montana...)

My beloved Suzanne does not have this kind of delay. She may not have a lot of words yet, but she knows how to conduct herself at all the sporting events. She knows "Yay" and "Go" and "oooooh" when something bad happens. I do fear, however, that she is taking after her father and brother in her love of sports and that I should just chuck my dreams of ballet recitals. Unless someone comes up with full-contact ballet, that is.

I'm thinking a lot about the issue of developmental delays only because we got an assessment report yesterday that listed Suzanne at the level of a 2 year old. This isn't a bad thing, by the way, it's just a report. I happen to know that on the day they did the testing it was in the afternoon when she was tired and not particularly cooperative. If it had been done in the morning, the result would have been somewhat different.

At any rate, Suzanne is right where I thought she was developmentally. I like getting this kind of information, not because I'm pigeon-holing Suzanne in any way, but because I like to know what to shoot for. Right now, I'm shooting for college and the Miss America pageant. As long as she is always moving forward there is no reason not to set the bar high for her. She is beautiful, charming, poised, very motivated when it is something that interests her, and she handles a hockey stick like a pro. What more could you ask out of ANY two-year old?

Boys will be boys...

2007-04-29T16:40:00.000-07:00

I never had a brother. Just one older sister. She's going to be 50 this year--her sixth decade. Man, that's old! (If you think I'm being unduly harsh, just know that my much beloved sister deserves every word--take that Susan!)

Anyway, back to the brother I never had. I remember when I was in the 6th grade thinking that a baby brother would be oh so fun. I mentioned this to my mother and after she wiped the look of horror off of her face, she calmly informed me that a baby would not be forthcoming because daddy had gotten a vasectomy. My mom is a nurse, so she always explained everything in a clinical and dispassionate way. Never a euphemism for her--nothing like, "Daddy pulled a muscle at work which is why he's spending the weekend snuggled up to a bag of frozen peas!"

This lack of a brother explains why boys are still somewhat a mystery to me and why Kirk causes consternation and mirth at the same time. Friday was a baseball practice night and we got ready to leave only to discover that the little man lost his baseball glove. The problem is the boy can be standing on top of something and not see it. He can find the one package of poptarts that I've hidden deep in the recesses of the pantry, but his coat or backpack that is sitting in the middle of the floor? Heck no!

We searched high and low when it occurred to me that I last saw him with it in the backyard. Not the vast backyard of the old house, no the current backyard which closely resembles a postage stamp. It was sitting in the dry creek bed (i.e. drainage ditch with fancy schmancy rocks in it...) right out in the open where the passengers on an airplane could see it with their own eyes. Kirk had to be sent out twice to find it.

This, and a weeks worth of offenses, resulted in him being grounded all weekend except for the Saturday game and pictures on Sunday. I was certain it was going to be a miserable weekend for Greg and me with all the neighbor kids knocking and asking if Kirk could play. Kirk would be miserable and mope around the house and this would be the longest weekend I've ever endured.

However, boys surprise you now and then. Kirk took his punishment fairly well, only pouted a little, and paid a lot of attention to his sister. They get along really well anyway, but this weekend they have played hockey and read books and kicked the ball and generally had a great time together. Suzanne slept until 8 a.m. this morning--8 a.m. folks. This almost never happens. She is a 6:30 a.m. girl and always has been. For her to sleep in, she must have been totally tuckered out last night. Probably because she spent most of the day playing with her big brother.

It makes me happy to know that Kirk will be around to look after his sister after Greg and I are pushing up daisies (unlike my mother, I am a great fan of the euphemism!). I think that the love that Kirk has for Suzanne runs pretty deep and will withstand even puberty and the teen years. He might be one of those grubby, rock throwing, stinky-footed little boys, but he has a great love for his family and Suzanne in particular. He is a caretaker by nature, much like his father. As I have often said, he is the perfect big brother for Suzanne.

I'm so glad that we decided to have another baby and that we ended up with Suzanne. I'd hate to think that Kirk's big brother talents might have been wasted...

Word of the Day

2007-04-27T11:46:00.000-07:00

What single word means all of these things...

1. A superstructure at the stern of a vessel.
2. To cause to become out of breath or fatigued.
3. A candid or pertinent factual report.
4. Excrement.

And the answer is...POOP! As in poop deck, pooped out, the poop, or poop in the potty. Poop seems to be the theme of my life right now. Either I am just plain pooped or Suzanne has pooped (usually somewhere obnoxious since she knows how to take off her clothes). Or I'm thinking longingly of having fruity umbrella drinks of the poop deck of a cruise ship or actually having time to read the entire newspaper to get the scoop and the poop. See, it's a theme and you all know how I love a theme...

Today we are talking about No. 4, which is often called No. 2! We have been working vigorously on potty training this week. Suzanne actually managed to tinkle in the potty chair on Wednesday, but the rest of the time she just sits on it and giggles. I think we had a breakthrough this morning, though. Unless I have her in non-removable clothes (I practically have to strap them on with duct tape), she will take off everything after she poops and leave the diaper on the floor. The poop nuggets, as Kirk calls them, tend to roll all over the place.

Today she did what she always does, except that this time she took off her diaper next to the toilet! I really think she is getting the idea about what we do in the bathroom. Gosh, I hope so because it was much easier to clean up and just flush it away.

Ahhhh, I can hear you thinking, "well if this happens every day, why doesn't she just watch her a little closer and catch her before she gets naked?" Two reasons actually. First, she buzzes (please refer to the previous blog entry). Second, kids with Downs have low muscle tone and may not be, uh, regular. While most of us have our "special moment" around the same time every day, Suzanne does not. I would have to keep her in my sights every waking moment, which is just not possible. I used to be able to just listen for her because she made the Pooping Noise, but now she has become the stealth pooper.

In essence, Suzanne is constantly searching for new ways to do things when I'm not looking. She may have Down Syndrome, but she's smarter than me.

Bee Bopping

2007-04-24T08:00:00.000-07:00

When I was a kid I really wanted a nickname. Fortunately for me, Chicken Legs never really stuck past the 8th grade and underscored the wisdom of being careful what you wish for. Now, my friend Karen has a nickname that has stuck for over 30 years. When you can walk through the Portland Airport 20 years after high school and hear, "Hey Buckethead!" yelled across the concourse you know it's a winner. In fact, one time my son had to ask me if Aunt Bucky had a real name or if that was it...

Suzanne has a nickname--it is "The Bee." Grandma Della is chuckling right now because she knows exactly what this means. Suzanne buzzes most of her waking hours. She makes a circuit of whatever room she's in, peruses her play opportunities, moves the furniture when appropriate to get up to something more interesting, rearranges anything that is on her level, touches almost everything...she buzzes! Currently she is tossing wooden blocks into bins, an activity that she's been at for several minutes now. When she is focused on something, her attention span gets much loooonger. When all the blocks are in one bin, she claps and cheers for herself before moving them back.

This goes on all day, everyday. She even reads books with this kind of intensity. She will go to the red book bin, pick one out, sit and peruse it, toss it aside and go get another. She will go through the entire bin in this fashion and when directed, she will put the books back and clean up. She points out characters like Carl and George (Good Dog Carl and Curious George) to whoever is listening and tell the story as she goes along. She does this mainly in Russian (okay, it just sounds like Russian) so it takes a good ear to pick out the real words.

Moving, talking, talking moving--she BUZZES. Since I am the one who gets to follow her most of the time, I am so grateful that we only built the 2288 and not the 2962. That extra 600 square feet of house would kill me!

Liquid Entertainment

2007-04-21T14:04:00.000-07:00

Drip, Drip, Drip...today we are having bit of rain, as the newspaper so eloquently puts it. A Bit my horses fanny! It is the kind of rain that only happens in the Pacific Northwest, a kind of drenching mist that leaves you soaked and cold, especially if the wind kicks up. Kirk is out playing baseball, the first game of the season, and Greg is taking pictures of the whole thing. I was terrified that they'd be home by now, but luckily the rain that started at game time stopped about 10 minutes later. Now we're just misting. There is a reason that everything is green around here...

Suzanne did not go to the game, partially because it started at nap time and mainly because the field that we are stuck at also doubles as an unofficial dog park. I'm used to people like my mother and Kathleen down the street who pick up after their dogs. Apparently the people who let their hairy beasts roam the ball field don't care that kids are going to be playing there--and in the case of Suzanne, rolling on the grass and picking up any little thing that catches her eye. ANYTHING! Suzanne has already eaten dog poop once in her life and lived to tell the tale (after a vigorous and probably unpleasant mouth scrubbing from me), but I have no desire to repeat the incident. What is wrong with those people? Dog poop for Heaven's sake. Today it's wet dog poop. And even if they mow, it only turns into a zillion bits of dog poop.

It's going to be a long baseball season...

Suzanne doesn't need help to get into trouble. She usually manages at least once a day to do something that makes me rear back in horror. Let's take yesterday--do you all remember what Otter Pops are? The are the poor man's popsicle, the kind that come in little tubes, about 200 for 5 bucks or something like that. If you go to Costco, you can get the giant economy last-all-summer-sized box. Greg brought some home on Thursday and we opened it and put some in the freezer to...well, I don't have to explain this part. Anyway, Friday morning Suzanne was being a little too quiet, so I went looking for her and lo and behold, she was sitting on the kitchen table merrily ripping the Otter Pops open. Now, it is important to note that I cannot get into the little suckers without the benefit of scissors. Suzanne seems to have found the magic way to open them, since (thankfully) there were no scissors in sight! I had the sticky goo all over the table, the floor, the pile of newspapers, Kirk's coat, etc... I have now mopped the floor 3 times and still I'm finding sticky places. And, the stuff dyes skin, so Suzanne has red and purple shins, making me look like a very baaaaaaad mommy. I'm hoping after the second bath today it all comes off. Otherwise she wears long pants until it disappears.

Well, the boys are back and Kirk got a hit so he's happy. He wasn't impressed with the after-game snack, though. Turns out the first mom on the list (also the mom who made the list and insists on "healthy" snacks) brought pretzels and some unappetizing juice. I have assured Kirk that when it is my turn I will disregard the black marker shouting "HEALTHY SNACKS!" and bring Capri Suns and chewy granola bars. Dion will be annoyed, but the boys will love me.

Kirk was also happy that there were warm cookies waiting for him when he got home. (Don't get too impressed, they were just the Pillsbury slice & bake kind.) I didn't know if the game was going to be rained out, so I prepared a treat just in case a sad little boy came home early. I believe strongly in the restorative power of cookies. My mom drilled this into me early in life--is there nothing a cooky can't do?

Hooray for Baseball!

2007-04-20T07:42:00.000-07:00

As the title says, Hooray for Baseball! We love baseball season around here--it's on the TV all the time, we get the extra MLB channels so we never miss a Giants game (they stink so far, but the season is young...) and Kirk turns into Mr. Baseball. The kid loves baseball more than pizza if you can believe that.

Suzanne is also a fan of baseball. She is a fan of anything where there is a lot of action and clapping and cheering. I suspect she will try out for the cheerleading or pep club one of these days. She likes to sit on the bench with the rest of the boys and clap for each batter--she doesn't play favorites.

This year Kirk is on the Rockies, so I think I'll get Suzanne a purple outfit to wear and cheer in. She might as well blend in and be fashionable, eh?

Even though Suzanne is clearly a tomboy, she does it with style. Yesterday at "Baby School," the name that Kirk has for her early intervention program, she wore a dress. It was a casual dress, but a dress nonetheless. I was impressed with her ability to play in the sandbox and then get out and brush off her skirt. Clearly she has learned how to play hard while maintaining her femininity! She also figured out that if you go down the slide headfirst, your skirt doesn't ride up. How practical!

Today we are planting flowers. I've gone back to my red, white & blue theme of several years ago. And since we don't have deer, the red ones might even stand a chance this time. (FYI--deer eat red flowers--they will leave the white ones alone for some reason.) We are planting petunias mainly because they are tough enough to withstand Suzanne. I figure if petunias can make it past the deer, they can make it past Suzanne.

There is yelling from down the hall. Kirk used to politely knock on the wall when he wanted to get up--Suzanne just bellows indignantly. Quiet time over!

Cat Birthdays

2007-04-19T07:27:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the Cat Birthdays. Emmy and Oscar are now 2 years old and the best kitties anyone could ever have. Kirk, who can now read the calendar, informed me that it was the cats' birthday and wouldn't it be nice if we had a cake? I hustled my fanny down to Safeway (we needed milk anyway) and got a little cake and some ice cream. Chocolate, of course, because the kitties are black.

I can't believe that people don't want black kitties, because they have great personalities. Oscar in particular is really good with Suzanne. He lets her pet him and tug on his ears and generally maul him around and he never scratches. He is so good natured and Suzanne loves him. She calls him "Kitty" or "Ok" and he comes to her when she pats her leg.

Yesterday is also the day that Suzanne decided to climb into the garden tub and turn on the hot water. As soon as the water went on I knew something was up and dashed into the room. There she was, happy as a clam at what she'd accomplished. And fortunately the tub is the farthest point from the hot water heater, so it is slow to get warm. She was only wet, but now I have something else in the house to secure. I feel like I live in a fortress sometimes--I can't keep anything where I'd like to, it all has to go up or in something or be tied down in some way. It's rather like being a prisoner in your own home. For example, we can't use Suzanne's dresser because she just tosses the clothes onto the floor and uses the drawers to climb to the top. The solution now is to keep her clothes in a laundry basket in the closet and tape her drawers shut with packing tape. The unexpected benefit is that now she can't get into her baby wipes and toss them around the room like snowflakes.

See what I mean? I'm just waiting for her to figure out a way around this latest fix.

I believe Suzanne is fairly high functioning. She is always thinking of something new and exciting to do, and I think it is more a thing of directing her into permitted activities. I will consider it a victory if she is potty trained by the time she enters preschool next fall. She doesn't have to be and many kids aren't, but I think it would be a good sign. I need all the good signs I can get.

In the meantime, I have two lovely cats who purr at me when I need a little time to calm down after one of Suzanne's antics. Emmy purrs louder, but Oscar will sit with me longer. Listening to the cats purr has become a form of much-needed meditation for me. All the more reason to get a cake and celebrate their birthdays!!

Today, better

2007-04-12T17:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, bad. Today, better. God sent me a little ray of sunshine named Hilary (my niece) and between the two of us, we managed to get a handle on sweet Suzanne. My house is slightly less chaotic and my husband is responding to my cries for help.

Since it is evident that I must rearrange my life in order to find a little peace, I have decided that we need to get a new computer. You see, I have a web design business and my current office is located upstairs in the guest room. But when I am in the guest room, I am not accessible to Suzanne and she gets into any and everything if my attention is focused somewhere else. However, if I get a laptop computer with a wireless router, I will be able to work in many different locations, including the back yard. The more I can keep an eye on Suzanne, the less inclined she is to get into things. Also, I will be able to quickly spot teaching moments, which is key for kids with DS. I can multi task, but I need to have a great deal of flexibility and mobility.

My desire for an orderly desk space has given way to my desire to have "Serenity Now!"

BTW, I love one-liners from Seinfeld. I'm currently having a real good time with "Jimmy loves Elaine..." Only it's aimed at Hilary the aforementioned niece. Her new boyfriend goes by the name Jimmy and I just can't contain myself. I actually spoke to him on the phone today, (apparently now I'm Hilary's secretary as well as her aunt) and managed not to say anything embarrassing about her. I nearly blew a gasket keeping the jokes on the inside, but I managed.

My beloved little girl is taking a late nap today, which makes for a lovely afternoon for me. My mom, my sister, and two adorable schnauzer puppies are descending upon me this evening and I've got beds to make and bathrooms to clean. It's a mother/daughter thing. I try to turn my house into a Hilton Hotel whenever mom comes, which stresses me out. I can't manage the Hilton on a regular day, what makes me think I can manage it just because mom is coming... I think I'll just settle for clean toilets and fresh sheets and leave the Hilton to Paris. As for mom and Susan, they are undemanding, low key guests and will also be happy with the toilet/sheet situation. 6 hours in a car with two puppies--maybe I should get a couple of bottles of wine, too...

They should have done a Seinfeld episode on Elaine preparing for a visit from her mother...that would have been really funny!

A Lesson from Bitsy

2007-04-11T09:16:00.000-07:00

Gosh, where do I start...

Having any child with a disability is difficult. You worry, you fret, you tear your hair out wishing things were different, that things were "normal." This is not a productive activity.

Then you begin to compare your child's disability with others and say "at least she doesn't have seizures" or "at least she can walk without assistance" or "at least she's healthy." Again, not a productive activity. My angel of a son says it best...you git what you git and you don't throw a fit.

I've been throwing fits lately. I used to think I was a patient person, I used to think I was giving and caring. Now, not so much. Now I'm a short tempered, impatient shrew of a mother who yells a lot. And yelling at or around a child with Down's Syndrome accomplishes nothing. In fact, it just scares Suzanne and reduces me to the level of dog poop.

There are moments of tremendous joy that comes with having a DS child. I am not currently having many of those moments. You see, Suzanne is a "terrible two." Not only is she developmentally delayed (i.e. she learns slower than other kids), she is doing the things other two year olds do. Doesn't seem fair, actually, that she should be saddled with both of these at the same time. She can do many things that other 2 year olds do, but she doesn't have the judgment to know that she shouldn't do them. Like climbing on top of her dresser or the dining room table or pushing chairs around so she can climb on other things. And every time she gets herself into a potentially dangerous situation, I feel more and more like a failure for not keeping her safe.

Which brings me back to this title of this post...A lesson from Bitsy. Back when I was in high school (when dinosaurs roamed the earth) my parents got me this wonderful little puppy named Bitsy. Not my choice of name, she came with it. She was a miniature Dachsund, black and tan, with a beautiful little face and warm sloppy tongue that she liked to give kisses with. Turns out, however, that Dachsunds have behavioral problems and like to do it their way. What eventually happens is that you don't train them so much as they train you. You change because they won't.

As I was driving home last night it hit me--my relationship with Suzanne is like that. Trying to get Suzanne to fit into my life and my way of doing things is fruitless and never going to happen. I need to fit into hers. She is running the show and I had better change and adapt because she can't. I've known for quite some time that I didn't have a life of my own anymore--I just didn't realize that Suzanne was so completely in charge. It is safe to say that I'm not taking this very well. I know that I'm entitled to have a life of my own, but I don't see how I'm ever going to have one again...

I hear sounds from downstairs...she's probably rifling through the trash again. Note to self--get a trash can that she can't get into...